Grindstone

Subtle changes, big doin's...

2010-03-18T18:59:00.002-03:00

I find I am so careless with my words and often times do not even realize the power that is in what I say. Lately there have been some confirmation of this fact to me. Without a lot of detail I have been doing a lot of drifting over the past few years. Circumstances have got the best of me and I quietly have drifted into my complacent little fog just floating through life. In those places of life it has become very easy to become bitter, back bite and allow my useless non God glorifying vocabulary to slide its way back in. Not fun...

Yet as of late God has been restoring me to a place where He is back on the throne and where His will is more important than personal preference or desires. In this place I am noticing that God's Word has become part of my conversation again. God's work is flowing off of my lips with a renewed boldness and confidence once again.

Once this process happens the words that have come out of my mouth have seemingly opened up doors for those around me to have some change in their lives. Am I saying that I am saving people? Not at all. What I am saying is that I am getting God back where He needs to be in my life, His Word thus flows more freely and the power in that is hitting people which results in his "overwhelming", awesome work in the lives of those around who recieve His Word. Needless to say, it is so cool to be reminded that God can use a wretch like me. Awesome!!!

So here is the question: How do we use our words? Do we tear people apart or do we build people up and speak God's Words over them? One of my favorite thoughts in the scriptures is when an Old Testament figure was called by God and annointed to do the Lord's work, one of the statements about him was that "his words did not fall to the ground". Do we waste our words on senseless thoughts and violent attacks towards our brothers and sisters or do we love as Jesus loved and restore lives with how we speak to and over people?

Just what's on my mind lately.
Peace

2010-03-17T09:58:00.002-03:00

Have you ever been at a place where you are thankful for an opportunity that God has provided and yet feel compelled that the reason He got you there was for a bigger picture? This is where I am. I am grateful for work, community, my fiance and my consistency with seeing my son. Yet while all of this is happening I have a stirring in my spirit that there is a greater thing happening here. I am not sure what it is, but it seems that I follow the Will of God this will increase that which is already good to level of better goodness. I could be wrong, but it seems that for those serving the Lord that "Good is not good enough". I am no longer content with surviving and keeping my head above water. I want to thrive and walk on water.

Have ya been there? Are you there now? Here is my question and I would love some insight on this one. How do you focus on today when the bigger picture seems to be on its way? Thanks ya'll... God bless....

Restoration

2008-12-02T18:22:00.004-04:00

So I suppose it is appropriate to say the typical "wow, it's been a while!" comment... There it was!

So this will be a super quick update as I need to work my way back into this whole blog thing again. As has happened to many, Facebook apparently has eaten my Blogger.

Here is my thought and I apologize to Kirk Perry for having a serious post, but that is how I roll this time.

So my mother has prayed for me many times regarding God restoring "what the locusts have taken away". I don't remember where that Scripture was referenced, but it has been something that I have been hoping for for a while. To make a long story short, I think I am beginning to see some part of that happening in my life.

This Christmas will be the first that I am going to be looking forward to in a long, long time. On Boxing Day I will be spending Christmas with my family, my son, and my girlfriend. God is clearly getting things in line for me during this season and though things are tough in other areas, I see how He is making things right when everything seemed to be going so wrong.

If you read this and can relate, hang in there. God is good!

blowouts, delays and drunks, oh my...

2007-12-08T19:27:00.000-04:00

so we had a fun night... as the case is with anything there was some adventure... keep in mind that this trip consisted of sidneys first train ride and NBA game... i think i saw sid go shy for the first time ever... as we were standing by the raptors entryway jose calderone came walking by and i urged sid to holler at him so i could get a picture with the two of them, but he clammed up... i have never seen that before and if you know or have met sid, you are surprised as well...

ADVENTURE #1:
sid and i were sitting in nearly the back row of the fleet center a very outspoken gentleman came up behind us and began slurring what sounded like explitives... then he grabbed sid's shoulders and said "i love this @#*%*#@ seat... go blankity blank celtics go!!! beat the blankity blank raptors!!!" so sid being sid started a conversation with him... i heard it said from someone that sid makes the world a better place and this was perhaps another example whether it was going to make a difference or not... long story short, the owners of the seat showed up and the gentlemen left with much grumbling, swinging and cussing...

ADVENTURE #2:
sid's poor raptors got blown out of the water... it was sad... they literally did not stand a chance... (2 best players were injured)

ADVENTURE #3:
on sid's first return train trip back to portland, we were informed that it was delayed by one half of an hour resulting in our 2.5 hour train ride leaving boston at 11:40 instead of 11:10... late night to say the least...

all in all i would say that it was a fun day despite the (mis)adventures that we had...

Thank you Lord for your protection as we travelled!!!

On life support, but still barely tickin'...

2007-12-07T01:22:00.000-04:00

The title is basically where my blog is. It is not dead, but active it is not either. Apparently the only time I am willing to post is when I visit my mother's place in Maine. Perhaps more visit's are in order. This post will be very simple because I am very tired and need to go to bed now. So here goes my amazing nugget of wisdom. I am very excited because I have Sidney with me and tommorrow we will be going to watch the Boston Celtics play against the Toronto Raptors in Boston. Needless to say I am stoked eh. (Authentic surfer and Canadian slang all in one sentence.) I am pumped because the last time I saw an NBA game was in Harbour Station and there was not a lot of effort displayed since it was a preseason game. So officially this is my 1st real NBA game where people should actually be trying. I am also mostly pumped because Sid's fave team is the Raptors and this is his 1st NBA game. Exciting times, exciting times. If I can figure it out there should be pics to come soon. Be blessed ya'll!!!

It's Alive!!!!!

2007-11-09T01:32:00.000-04:00

It is amazing, yet incredibly frustrating how one can fight the same battles over a long period of time and often never feel like there has been any progress made. At the same time too it is odd that there are days where one can say without any visual evidence that there is victory and the struggles (be it personal or outside type of stuff) will soon pass. This is what I often find with my walk with God. Somedays it just comes so naturally to walk with the Lord and be confident of what I know to be true. Then there are other days when it ain't so easy to believe. I suppose this is a natural part of being human, but does it have to be? I think I may know the answer to that already.

Anyway, I just wanted to put a small post here so that I could be deemed alive again. Plus it might be good to finish the whole 40 days of praise thing. Time to just suck it up and be thankful regardless of my circumstances and my shortcomings.

Lot's of stuff has happened since the last post and strangely enough there is a lot that is still the same. I will update and try to do some funny stuff along the way as I feel inspired and become alive to the blogger life again.

Praise note: Thank you so much God for protecting my mother in her accident. From our human perspective there is a lot that should have happened and yet she was pretty much unscathed. Thank You BIG!!!

How Facebook ate my blog...

2007-06-19T11:03:00.000-03:00

Insane... it is odd how new things come along and other things just seem to fade away... things are always moving i suppose... so many thoughts running though my mind on this idea, but i will not preach... though it will be a good message someday...

hard to believe that this school year is all but 2 days over... PTL that next year i know what I am doing again... it is weird to live on a year by year process, but at least I know for now...

my little guy turned 3 on father's day (17th) and i am hoping to see him next week... crazy...

i guess there is not a lot going on in my head (leave it alone) right now, but i did want to update so that if there are people who actually read this blog, they will not think i am dead... things are goodish and will keep moving whether i choose to move, love, or sit still... so as always and as we all do, I have a choice with how I want to live the life that God has given me/us... anywho...

can't wait for...

Helpless???

2007-05-03T14:47:00.000-03:00

An observation that has occurred to me is how "self" absorbed I can become. In the fall I felt the Lord was asking me to step back from local church youth ministry for a spell and eventually that is what I did. I believe this step of obedience was good, but at times during this break I have caught myself dwelling on my issues as if no one else around me was hurting. Could part of my willingness to step back be because it is tough to be there or feel like I have to be there? Ouch!!!

What got me to thinking about this has been an instance of me trying to be there for someone as of late. It has been amazing to be able to be there and pray with them, but it is painful when I leave these moments and the enemy still seems to have a hay day with this person. Part of me (well most, okay all of me) wishes that I could say the magic words to make peoples struggles go away and they could live strong and unfazed by satan's attacks. It really causes me to feel very helpless. This is humbling. Perhaps it is the man in me, but I wish I could fix everyone's problems and leave feeling like it will all be okay. Yet this is not the case. So without knowing fully what next to say or even what I should say, I guess I cling to this verse and live it:

I lift my eyes up to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip - he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you - the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm - he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forever more.
Psalm 121

Funny post yet to come, but someday i promise...

whoa, random...

2007-04-23T10:07:00.000-03:00

hello all,

so i guess i have some catching up to do... but first i want to say that i have been blessed by some serious posts from people who i did not expect serious posts from... it has been neat and encouraging to see your hearts... that's right, i said neat...

so i had an awesome time with my boy and then boys the weekend before last... it was great to see lee and it was great to go potty with my youngest... it was the first time for me with him and it was so cool to do a daddy thing... every little thing is a great blessing for me with the kids...

one question that came to me over that weekend though that i have been chewing on for about a week and a half is "what is my mission?" just got me thinking i guess...

this saturday was our first contemporary service since a month before Christmas and i loved it... it was so good to play with the guys again and it was an amazing time of worship... (for me anyway... i can't speak for anyone else) i then proceeded to the world's greates campfire... if you missed that, well then you just missed it... too bad for you...

i also am enjoying the tradition of sunday night phase 10 after church... despite the volume level in the house, there is much laughter and i appreciate that greatly... here are two memorable quotes from such evenings:

Rhonda: "skip Theron"
Theron: "Rhonda!!! Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

Scottie: "I'm out."
Theron: "I'm gonna slit your throat!!!!!!"

ahhh, good times...

and so now i am going away for senior girls volleyball to saint andrews... tim and i have coached this team for the second year in a row and i really enjoy it... they are a great group of girls and are a lot of fun to be around... it is fun to win too, but you know...

so yeah, there is my update... with all this serious posting going on i think that i may have to dig deep and come up with a funny one... i will see what i can find... until next time boys and girls; scott's quote of the week was so my idea...

later...

40 Days of Praise: Day 763

2007-04-12T14:43:00.000-03:00

true story; hope the ending is not too predictable for some who hate that in true stories... (scott ings)

the other night was a really bad night in terms of sleeping... in other words it was just not happening... it has been a long time since i have had nightmares, but let's just say that the other night was being lam basted hard core with some freaky stuff in my sleep... after waking up around 3 or 4 times i finally clued in that it may be something bigger... so i rolled over and said perhaps the simplest prayer i have ever uttered... it went a little something like this " God, Ya gotta help me out here, I need sleep... Amen... "

here comes the predictable ending... i then rolled over again and that was it for the night until my alarm went off in the morning... Praise God... He is in there for the big and small... i love these reminders... So thank you God for protecting my mind and getting me back to sleep and keeping me there... You are so good...

40 Days of Praise, Day ???

2007-04-07T14:46:00.000-03:00

so this is a quick one and i don't even know what day i am on... but anywho...

as was mentioned the band got together wednesday night for our first practice since a month before Christmas... all i can say is that it felt right... i loved it... we worked on 3 new songs and it was great... God just seemed to bring it together and it was a great time of worship... i have really missed these times and hope that we can be disciplined enough to keep this up and have the saturday night services again...

yep, so i guess that is it... Thank You Lord for the guys... May You be the center of our music... it is Yours anyway...

point form post...

2007-04-04T10:35:00.000-03:00

just a bit of an update so that kirk does not pronounce me dead...

1) i am not dead despite the attempt on my life by "not neves" and as a side note have gained a taste for paint and glue... okay, the acquired taste may or may not be a lie...

2) once again the mavs finished 4th place and i left the tournament limping and bruised... how fun... i love sports... (really i do)

3) for the first time in a while i got a bit of an april fool's ribbing in... i was able to convince a close friend of mine that the bay of fundy is not considered a part of the atlantic ocean. just a separate, unconnected body of water... love ya sarah...

4) i suppose this could be a praise, but i am super pumped because the band is getting together tonight and practicing for the first time since about a month before Christmas... can't wait... may Christ be the center of this...

yep, so that's all... be blessed today...

bit of a break...

2007-03-28T18:18:00.000-03:00

okay, todays post will not be a day of praise, but who knows, maybe i will find a praise as i type this out... that type of stuff is kind of cool...

so todays post will be called "How Stephanie Fitzsimmons Tried to Kill Me."

due to my phenonmenal ability to gab i missed the boat off of white head today the first time so i had to spend another hour and a half at the school... didn't seem to bad until i offered to help stephanie with some of the odd jobs/spring cleaning she was doing in her class... the first job was to clean out two red bottles of paint so that we could put pink (steph's fave color) paint in them... so i did and as is the case most times when i play with paint, my hands ened up dirty... no prob i thought... then my next job to do was to sort through some construction paper and put them in very percise piles... yet as i was separating them i had to moisten my fingers so instintively i licked them... paint does not taste good incase anyone was wondering... now she claims that it was non-toxic, but i just wanted to say that if i do not post within the next week, kirk perry has the right to pronounce me... well you know what...

hopefully my next post i will be able to tell you all about the tournament this weekend and how we came in better than friggin' 4th place this year...

peace,

~scotland~

40 Days of Praise: Day 29

2007-03-21T14:43:00.000-03:00

Undone by MercyMe

To the cross I run
holding high my chains undone.
Now I am finally free,
free to be what I've become.
Undone.

This has a couple of different meanings for me but I think that somehow they go together. The other night in Bible study one of the questions posed was regarding plans that we had for our lives and how they compare to where we are and what our plans are now. To say the least, I am not where I planned on being in many areas of my life. This process has been tough on me to say the least. Through these times of molding and struggling and fighting and whatever emotion there is "I" have become undone and seemingly have lost control of my life. Now this is not to say that I cannot handle everyday stuff, but the Big Picture is not in my control anymore. Slowly, I think that is becoming okay with me. Slowly. Yet in this process of what seems to be a negative in becoming undone, the chains are coming undone as well. Chains of allowing opinions of others to hold me down, chains of buying into the lies that I am not good enough and trust me there are many other chains that are becoming undone and I suspect many more to come.

For this unravelling of sorts, I am beginning to give God praise. Not totally there, but today I can give God praise for this. Gloria Dios.

40 Days of Praise: Day 28

2007-03-13T15:58:00.000-03:00

Today's note of praise is simple.

Lord, I thank You for my young adult Bible study group, the study, the conversations and for what You are teaching me through these lessons. Awesome.

40 Days of Praise: Day 27

2007-03-01T13:00:00.000-04:00

Today's praise came in the form of an answer to yesterdays questions that i was having.

I had a meeting with an individual who wants me to work with a young person as a Big Brother type of role. The dilema for me is that instead of losing hours with Sid, I have gained hours. (some problem, eh?) So I have been wondering how I was ever going to fit a few extra hours in my schedule, but I am going to try. As our conversation concluded we were joking about how I am bouncing from place to place regarding work, Bible study, basketball, volleyball and other various activities and then she made a comment that God totally took and deposited into my innermost being. As we were leaving she off the cuff said, "you are needed here" regarding the busyness of working with special needs and possibly being a big brother, etc... Now I understand that what was said was said in jest, but it hit me in the heart. I am needed. Wow! I am not sure if that is more scary or encouraging, but man it felt good to hear.

So:

God I thank You for Your word for me through this woman who may not have realized that she was giving it to me. I know that without you I am nothing, but with You there is purpose.

...and for the record, if you are reading this and are feeling useless and discouraged, God wants you to know that you are needed. He wants to take you, mold you and use you. Are you available? Think about it. God needs and wants to use you. Amazing.

40 Days of Praise: Day 26

2007-02-28T12:53:00.000-04:00

It is funny I think that even though I have work that I love I can still catch myself feeling restless like there is supposed to be more or "something" is going to be "more" fulfilling. I caught myself feeling this way for the first time in a while today. Not envious of someone or something, but just restless. Now don't get me wrong, I understand what I am doing is important, but for some reason today it just felt like it wasn't enough. Not sure, just being honest.

So that being said, here comes the praise. Yesterday I made a post and began with saying that I did not feel like praising, but decided that I had to anyway. That post ended up dissappearing into cyber space or something. Today's blog has the same feeling of blah, but if I am to change my perspective I must "resolve" to praise through the crap. Lord, I praise You for Jeremiah 29:11. Though today I feel like I am falling short and am not offering enough, or there is something bigger for me, You know the plans that You have for me. That means for today and beyond. Help me to see the impact that I may be making today and be thankful.

And for those that are interested and praying, this weekend was supposed to be my first unsupervised weekend with Vaughn and it does not appear that will be happening. Please pray for God's timing in all of this. Thanks.

And just for fun because I thought this was awesome. At the risk of being a progger:

40 Days of Praise: Day 25

2007-02-26T10:38:00.000-04:00

today's praise has got to be for an amazing weekend... the break was nice, the kids on the basketball teams played amazing and for the first time ever both boys and girls won the championship in the same year and my time with my son was excellent...

and for the record as a totally biased father my son is a kick butt bowler for a 2 year old... he may or may not have beat me if i was keeping score... so we did that for 2 hours and to be honest i think he could have gone til they turned the lights out... then we ate... that was nice... things are looking good... so...

Lord, I thank You for an awesome weekend filled with fun, rest and my beautiful little boy... Your blessings are amazing and though I sometimes struggle to show it, I am thankful... Praise You!

and if you are looking for a funny, yet accurate depiction of the basketball games, see www.habhater.blogspot.com

40 Days of Praise: Day 24

2007-02-22T10:42:00.000-04:00

Today's praise is for His provision. Have I used that one already??? Oh well, He never ceases to amaze me. In short, I have had the vehicle situation, hotel situation all taken care of for this weekend. Which means that I get to see the games, most importantly see my son and also get a bit of a break off of Grand Manan which is appreciated always. So thank you Tim (car), Julie (accomodations),Geoff (my ride to work on thurs), Jo (for prayers) and most importantly God for always seeming to work things out. You are all amazing. Have a blessed weekend "ALL". I am blessed to be an acquaintence with you all. May God give you a wonderful weekend of rest over these next few days.

Gloria Dios!!!!

In regards to the Jeep... to be continued...

40 Days of Praise: Day 23

2007-02-21T23:31:00.000-04:00

Today is going to be honest. Actaully everyday is honest, but I will openly admit today that I don't feel much like praising. But I will anyway. I think I heard Joyce Meyer or someone say something like speak truth even when it doesn't seem real and watch God make things happen. Something like that. I can't believe I just quoted Joyce Meyer on my blog. Weird.

First I will say why I don't "feel" like praising just to face it and determine to not be defeated by it. As well I could use some prayer on this issue ASAP. Basically my Jeep died today. I think it is the starter, but the timing is the issue more than the actual event. I am suppose to take Sid to Fredericton Friday night for the Provincials and then I will be staying Saturday to spend some time with Vaughn. Ya see the frustration here. Prayer is appreciated. Thank you.

So in the midst of all this, I will say that I am glad that;

"My God will never leave me or forsake me. Whether I see it or feel it or get to go away this weekend or not, THAT IS FACT. "

40 Days of Praise: Day 22

2007-02-20T10:42:00.000-04:00

As was mentioned before this whole process of 40 Days has been a changing of perspective time. God has used this time to take things that normally I would complain about or just not like and help me to see the blessing in them. I had one of these moments yesterday.

As has been the case a lot lately, yesterday was a snow day and school was cancelled. Normally this bothers me and I hate to miss days at work. This was the case for yesterday as well, but God redefined some of my thinking. I don't like winter and missing a day of work because of it does not make it any better, but as I was driving home yesterday after a "relaxing" day off I had a moment. There is a car comercial where the guy who is driving his car "arrives" at what he calls the perfect moment and ends up losing it because he got distracted by what was for lunch. Well as I was driving home God blessed me with one of those moments. As I was entering Seal Cove it was amazing. The sky was beautiful and orange, the sun was glistening on the snow, the water on the left was calm and the village just seemed like something off of a post card. As I was put in awe by this beautiful scenery these are the words that I heard in the background being sung to a beautiful acoustic guitar.

How can I keep from singing Your praise?
How can I every say enough,
how amazing is your love.

How can I keep from shouting Your name?
I know I am loved by the King
and it makes my heart want to sing.

As this was happening God took what I normally hate (snow) and revealed it to me as one way that He decorates His creation to bless me with its beauty.

Thank you Lord that You would do that for me. What amazing love You must have for Your children.

40 Days of Praise: Day 21

2007-02-19T14:21:00.000-04:00

well here we are... we are now on the back 9 of the 40 Days of Praise... there was a while when i thought i would never get this far... but here we go...

todays note of praise goes to God for His transforming power... i shared a bit of this last night at church and i will touch on it a bit today... i am just amazed by God and His patience as we (I) go through this every day routine (or not routine) called life... honestly, i would have given up on me a long time ago, but God has not and despite the rough edges He still blesses and moves in me and through me... i love that though i may never understand it...

just a bit of my testimony: when my mother was pregnant and i was the one inside of her blessing her with my wonderful kicking skills God did something very significant... yes even more significant than having me brought into the world... hard to believe i know... well my mother was pregnant before she was married and i was concieved outside of the confines of marriage... now my mom was a woman who was serving the Lord so the guilt that she felt was tremendous... moving along... there was a night that she went to her church and there was a special evangelist there and he was known for his prophetic ministry... after ther service there was a call and because of the guilt my mother was glued to her seat... a bit later on this man approached my mother and the words he spoke rocked her (and apparently me) to the core... he said to her without ever meeting her, "Donna, do not be ashamed and do not be discouraged because inside of you is a baby boy who is going to win God's people to Him."

the funny thing about this testimony is that my mother never told me this part of her life until i was in my third year at bethany training to be a youth pastor... and to be honest there have been a lot of days when i have felt that i am not fulfilling that word very well, but it is good to know that God does have a purpose regardless of my foolishness at times...

so this is why i have changed my blog's name to "Grindstone"... God is and has been taking me through a process where He is transforming me by taking of some rough edges and to be honest in a lot of cases it has been painful... but ultimately it is good to get to a God centered perspective bit by bit... So:

I praise You God for Your Transforming Power. Mold me Lord.

40 Days of Praise: Day 20

2007-02-16T10:43:00.000-04:00

Today's note of praise is something that I have not been thankful for for a long time. This past week we celebrated a familiar holiday to all of us which wells up good, gushy emotionns in some and bad, bitter emotions in others. That's right boys and girls, I am talking about Scottie's birthday eve otherwise known as Valentines Day. In the past and a lot over this past year the thought of that day or lovey dovey couples in general made my skin crawl, but God has been doing something in me this week. For some reason I have appreciated my singleness over this past couple of weeks more than ever. I don't know if I can fully explain that because I am not sure where this transformation is coming from, but it is kind of cool I guess. It also dawned on me again last night as I was sitting amongst a group of friends eating way too much birthday cake and peanut butter cookies. As I scanned the room of 10-12 people all were couples except me and one other. Now just a few months ago (around Christmas break) I sat in the same type of situation and left the group of people at one of the lowest points that I have been at emotionally. All I could see is what these people had and what I did not. It was brutal on my head and my heart. Yet as I sat there last night, not only did I have a peace, but almost a thankfulness for my current dating (or lack there of) situation. This is new, but I like it.

Now don't get me wrong here. I don't think along the same lines as Paul and feel that I am called to be single and life is better that way for all of my days. Also if God were to say to me, "Here she is Scottie. Now do things right this time" I would not complain, but until that day comes I think I may survive if this attitude of thankfullness can stick around. So here it is and to be honest, I can't believe I am saying this"

Thank you God for my singleness. Even though I don't always feel it, it is a gift from You. May I take advantage of this time to invest in others, invest in me, invest in my kids, and in my future mate by prayer and becoming the man that You want me to be. Amen.

40 Days of Praise: Day 19

2007-02-15T11:01:00.000-04:00

i wanted to leave a video on here but i am technologically challenged so i will not... but given the recent 2 days where we have snow days and i do not get to go to work, it was titles "things not to do on snow days"... i liked it and if i can figure this out i may post it later... go progger go...

today i think that my praise has got to be for the people around me that God has provided for me this winter... be it with financial help or whatever, God has blessed me with good family, friends who genuinly care for me and for that i am thankful... everyday is still a battle, but i know that there is help and even if all these people fail me, God's still got my back... it sounds so cliche, but each day that rings true...

now am i where i wanted to be when i was to turn 29? not really, but i guess i am not in control and that is alright... i have a good way of messing stuff up... better for me to have someone bigger handle my affairs...

not to quote a country song but "Jesus, take the wheel"... i am tired of swerving...

40 Days of Praise: Day 18

2007-02-07T11:06:00.000-04:00

Getting close to halfway there and it has been kind of cool to see how things swing a bit when one's perspective changes. Still hard times and annoying interruptions in life, but it is easier to cope with a more God centered perspective.

Todays praise is for answered prayers. It is so easy to take for granted the "little stuff" that we pray for and just assume will happen. This happened to me on Saturday. The weather was snowy and rotten as I was about to drive to Fredericton to see my little guy, who by the way is a kick butt bowler. Before I was about to get off of the boat I slipped up a prayer asking for safety on the road as I travelled there and back. When I returned to Black's Harbour it dawned on me that God answered my prayer. What caused me to realize this was the fact that I saw a car in the ditch on the way to Freddy, a fender bender in Freddy and a car that slid into the division between the highways between Saint John and Black's. Apparently it only took me three times to notice before I clued into what the Lord was telling me.

So...

Lord, I thank You for answered prayers even if I forgot that I prayed them. You are faithful.

40 Days of Praise: Day 17

2007-02-01T14:40:00.000-04:00

As I have been doing a little reading lately God is challenging me on how I use my time... I believe that He is moving me from being lonely to being alone with Him... That sounded much nicer in my head... crap... Anywho, what I mean is that I think God is changing my perspective on my alone time... Having some insight into others lives has helped me to realize how fortunate I am to be able to be alone and get that intimate time with God...

The thing is this... I basically work from 8:45 to 8 or 9 at night, but it is amazing the way that God has orchestrated these jobs so that I can step back and attempt to "just be" with Him... For example, as I am travelling to work I take a half hour boat ride which is amazing for reading and sitting silently with God... Even in the silence God speaks through the beautiful nature that I see each trip... On the trip back there is a Christian radio station that has a sermon for the exact half hour of my trip... Adrian Rogers is the preachers name and I swear that he is speaking right to me most days... As well with my job during the evening it is so nice to be able to step back and go to my room and worship on my guitar while my student entertains himself... This is so unique and the more I think of it, I am thankful for this situation...

So here it is: God, I am thankful for the times that YOU have set aside for me to be with YOU... May I take advantage of them and not complain about being bored and lonely... They truly are precious and I don't want to take them for granted anymore...

40 Days of Praise: Day 16

2007-01-31T23:18:00.000-04:00

I have to admit that today has been tougher for me to find something to praise about for whatever reason... Could be my selfishness, lack of faith or focus on the right things... I'm not sure, but the focus fog sure hit thick today, but there is still something to praise about none-the-less even though I feel I really had to search for it...

Today God reminded me of his past blessings and how He has taken care of me... I was chatting with someone on MSN and discussing some unexpected stressful "issues" that came my way today and I became very frustrated again with "things"... Yet as we discussed these things I went back to how God has got me through "crap" before so I suppose that He would be there for me now too though I am not sure how... As I got to this type of thinking something inside of me squirmed (I don't think it was gas) and I became very anxious... It was almost like I would rather be upset with my situation than have peace and remember God's past blessings... As I think of it, this is a strange comfort zone if you ask me... But like it or not, if I don't ignore the obvious or become hard hearted, God has been there and brought me throught a lot and I guess He ain't done...

As well this week I was given an article that I did for the Christian newspaper sometime last year... It spoke on being in our "ruts" in life and as I read it the Holy Spirit began to convict me with my own words of praise to the God who has blessed over and over...

So though my "Inner Critic" and my flesh don't want me to say this today; I Praise You Father for Your Reminders of Your Past Blessings Because They Remind Me That You Have Been Faithful, You Are Faithful Today and You Will Always Be Faithful... Continue to remind me often if You please...

40 Days of Praise: Day 15

2007-01-29T11:12:00.000-04:00

Today I think I have to give praise to God for music... It seems that whenever the enemy would attack me with discouragement, my desire to play my guitar or the churches piano or drums decreases greatly... Yet when I decide to "suck it up" and not let the enemy have the victory and play on, I have beautiful times with my Saviour... As of late God has been bringing me back to music and I have been much more disciplined in spending that personal time with Him and "He" shows how beautiful it is to have those intimate times again... this is so odd to me since i never touched a musical instrument before i my second year of college, but I suppose we never know what pleasant surprises God has for us... So there it is: Thank you Saviour for music and the ability that you've given me to use this gift for You... May I use it more and more as I long to be with You...

40 Days of Praise: Day 14

2007-01-26T09:54:00.000-04:00

Today my praise is for heat... I am thankful for warm climates, and warm houses...

That being said, I really appreciate them today for it is freezing outside as well as inside my house... I woke up and much to my delight (NOT!!!) I could see my breath... Now initially I was hoping that this was some elaborate prank and I was actually outside of my house, but alas I was not... That is the funny part...

Here is where I am asking for prayer: I have two options for oil trucks... One will be here on Sunday and they allow me to put a little in at a time and option #2 is one that would cost I think 400-800 dollars to fill my tank which of course I do not have... I do not get paid til next Friday, so you see my conumdrum here I am sure... I sure can't wait til spring so the weather will be warmer and I can fill my tank a little at a time and be ahead next winter... So if ya would, please pray... I need a Holy Spirit blanket around my house so my pipes don't freeze...

Typically I would be super stressed, but now I am not... Just a little concerned... I have no clue what to do, but fortunately someone bigger than me will help me out... Right???

40 Days of Praise: Day 13

2007-01-25T09:58:00.000-04:00

Man oh man, I am seriously flying here... I think this is my third post this week... Perhaps I am coming out of my little funk and getting thankful again... And to think that a couple of days ago I was going to put a "closed" sign on this blog and not do this blog thing anymore... I had a thought today that I want to share and then I will share my praise for today... I had the scripture in my head earlier and it has now left me, but it was about us humbling ourselves before God and this morning on my drive to work it hit me in a new light... This may not be new to all you scholars out there but for me it was a Eureka moment... God wants us to humble "ourselves" before Him... Now before you say Duh, let me explain why this is such a revelation to me... I think I always just assumed that being humbled meant that there would be humbling circumstances that would happen to me and that is how I would be humble... Now don't get me wrong, there have been plenty of those, but it occurred to me this morning that for us to humble ourselves before God was an intentional act for us to do... But here is my question: How do I/we in real, nuts and bolts life do this? I am sure that is is something that I should know by now, but can someone tell me what I am missing here?

And now on to my praise... I am thankful for and praise God for His love... Admittedly there have been a lot of times in life and as of late that I have questioned God's love for me, but thinking back to the last weekend that I was able to see my son, God reminds me of His love for me as I think of my love for my son...
As I was able to speak to a friend of my from my old church we talked about what a great illustration parenthood is of God's love for us... When my son hugs or kisses me, or when he says thank you daddy, the pride, excitement, and joy that wells up in me is overwhelming... Is this how God feels when we love on Him or express thankfulness to Him? According to His Word I am getting to the place where this is bit by bit becoming real to me... So although I do not always "feel" it I am thankful for God's love... Thanks Timmy, it does come back to that...

40 Days of Praise: Day 12

2007-01-24T12:09:00.000-04:00

i am thankful for "Dog Beer" because it quite literally made my eyes water due to the laughter that it brought out from my innermost being... check this out...

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/D/DOGGIE_BEER?SITE=MITRA&SECTION=ENTERTAINMENT

if you do not find this funny due the foolishness of it i would like to quote the wonderful band named HOKUS PICK...

micheal w. smith, he doesn't need anything, he's perfect...

oh, wait... that's not it... here goes: "YOU REALLY NEED TO LEARN TO LAUGH!"

40 Days of Praise: Day 11

2007-01-22T10:05:00.000-04:00

i am thanful for spaghetti... cheap and it gets me by when the cupboards are bare... yay for spaghetti...

40 Days of Praise: Day 10

2007-01-10T13:39:00.000-04:00

wow, wow, wow... this forty days thing has finally reached double digits... despite what the lack of blogging may indicate to some, deep down i am thankful... especially after last sunday when i was able to spend time with my youngest boy... that makes me thankful... he is so beautiful... and yes he is mine... i know you were thinking it...

today's blog is simple... i praise God that i can be real and not have to feel condemned... of course that does not mean that i always feel free of such thoughts but i am SLOWLY learning that God created me and that is cool... often times i feel bad because my realness or in confusing times i feel like i am complaining, but i suspect that God is big enough to handle my questions... i suppose i just have to get past seeming vulnerable in peoples eyes and ask the questions and be willing to dig deep to find the answers...

does anyone ever feel bad for feeling blunt and not so proper at times? is this less Christian??? this pic although fun represents a lot of what i have been feeling lately bouncing back and forth between two schools of thought... this is a discussion starter so, ready, set, GO...

40 Days of Praise: Day 9

2006-12-28T14:12:00.000-04:00

Todays praise note is for leftovers... before Christmas time my cupboards and fridge resembled something like what Old Mother Hubbards must have looked like... then comes the family diner and this year it was determined that it would be hosted at my home... there must have been around 20 or so people there and it was a really fun time... also my home has never been so neat and has remained that way since... but it was a real good time and we definately had a good feed... as people began to disperse and leave for their homes they packed up what they had brought and left it in "my" fridge... HOLY CRAP i thought as my bare fridge became full... what a blessing this is.... i now have food... i think as a kid i used to complain about leftovers, but now they are awesome... so yeah, there is my praise for today... still bored, can't wait to see the kids, keep praying... have a great day!!!

40 Days of Praise: Day 8

2006-12-25T17:41:00.000-04:00

So here we are moving at a snails pace through this forty days thingy... But hey, despite the discouraging things that always seem to nag i am still praising, mostly... Today was a good day and last nights service was nice other than the fact that i almost coughed my lungs out in front on 200 or so people... as i think about the next week or so that is ahead of me i am thankful for my job... of course it has it's days that are tough, but i love it... especially since starting tommorrow my mother is going back home and most everyone i know will be away or back to work... for this i praise God for my job and i kind of look forward to getting back... but i am thankful for the break as well... just overall thankful i guess... and hey, if you are bored call me because i will be too...

here's hoping you all had a blessed Christmas and have a great 2007...

40 Days of Praise: Day 7

2006-12-11T13:32:00.000-04:00

so things aren't being posted here on a daily basis, but i will continue on with my 40 Days of Praise none-the-less... things have been a bit interesting in the last couple of post eh? fun stuff... thank you to those who have been encouraging and have been faithful to lift me up and be my strength/prayer warriors in the tough days... words cannot express...

for those who have been a little tougher on me (politically correct), thanks as well... there are times when your challenging words have caused me to think and question myself... don't get the word question confused with doubt because as i seek what God has for me for now, Grand Manan and the amazing people of this community are definately are what God has for me now in terms of where i live, ect... do i understand that totally??? nope, but all i know is that when i have been obedient, the Lord blesses...

today's praise note is this: I praise God that i will be spending some quality time with my son real soon... now admittedly things have not totally worked out they way that i saw them happening, but still God has been good... as i speak to the people representing me it is evident that real soon things are going to move in the direction of quality father/son time sans babysitter... am i just a smidge excited about this??? YOU'RE FREAKIN' RIGHT I AM!!! so yeah, that is my praise today... 3 years in the making is finally coming into fruition... praise the Lord for His patience with me and love and blessings, etc, etc, etc...

40 days of praise Day 6

2006-12-07T16:07:00.000-04:00

today boys and girls i am thankful for sleep... it amazes me how thinking about things, whether they be fact or fiction tucker people out... i am pooped... need rest... yeah... must stop thinking and caring about what i think people think of me... it hurts my head and makes me sleepy... i need a nap... love ya'll...

40 Days of Praise: Day 5

2006-12-05T10:42:00.000-04:00

sorry for the delay... i felt that since i was not seeing my kids every second of everyday that i could not do anything else... thank you for the clarification on this issue stephy... actually if i had the choice i would love to see the kids everyday, but sadly that is not an option at this point...

now on to the praise... i am thankful for how God seems to work things out... that is as simple as it gets i guess... when i for whatever reason can't see the sun through the clouds it amazes me that there are things going on none-the-less... God revealed that to me again as he answered yet another prayer request that i had no idea which way things would go... in fact i was preparing to move in the direction of God not blessing me in this situation... some come to me and say, do you know that such and such is the Lord's will for you? then i say yes or no or i don't know and if the answer is yes, they confidently tell me to speak what i know to be God's truth... sounds kind of bold and despite being a Christian for 13 years i sometimes still wonder if i can be so bold... understand that i know the answers in my head, but i think i may have trust issues for whatever reason... though i know God wants to bless me, i wonder if He will anyway... i like to be a positive bubbly person, but i think i expect the worst in a lot of situations because of things that have happened in the past... it is almost like i can believe that God wants to bless you more than He does me...

yet despite my lack of faith, or whatever it is, God is still moving and never ceases to amaze me... praise God for moving and caring about me... praise God for wanting to bless me and even doing it... may i be bold enough to believe that He wants to do that too...

in the future, be ready because i am believing that there will be posts to come where i will say what God has done to bless me and blow my socks off...

also, thanks to everybody for the concern in the last post, but if i can make a request; like kirk said, i am not a fan of the anonymous thing either (especially if it is negative) so if you want to be a part of these conversations, give us a name... also, love each other... for real...

40 Days of Praise: Day 4

2006-11-23T10:35:00.000-04:00

for the millions and millions from all around the world come faithfully and read this blog and cling to its every word i apologize for forgetting yesterdays blog... in leiu of what will hopefully be happening this weekend, todays note of praise goes out for my children...

although i don't get to see them as often as i would like to i am still very thankful for them... i am also very thankful that i have boys as well... no offence ladies, but female drama hurts my head... it astounds me how everytime i see the kids the become more and more like little men... seeing their personalities in certain situations just simply makes me laugh... for what little bits of time i get to see them they bring huge joy to me... it will be a beautiful day someday when i can have them for some guy time on my own and be the father that i want to be... that is not a shot or complaint for the current circumstance, but just anticipating the bigger things that are to come... to take what God has taught me and deposit that into my sons; that is what life is all about i am sure... i know there are going to be tough times, but to be able to invest in these little lives that God has blessed me with is a huge honor that i do not take lightly... praise you God for my little boys... what a gift...

40 Days of Praise: Day 3

2006-11-21T13:45:00.000-04:00

i am thankful and praise God for my young adult bible study group that meets every monday night... things are beginning to open up a bit and it is getting really good... monday night is quickly becoming one of my highlights of the week... we are studying how to naturally reach out and love those around us... thank you kim for hosting... thank you stephanie for "not" being the leader... i love this time... it is very unique that a group of people can get together, give each other a hard time, laugh a lot, get serious about learning how to love and then talk about whatever til 1:00 in the morning... God has truly blessed me with an amazing group of friends who i feel like i can call... obviously there are some who i am more willing to give intel to than others, but overall this is an amazing group... i feel like i am gushing now, but i really do love this time... Praise You Lord!!!

40 Days of Praise: Day 2

2006-11-20T14:35:00.000-04:00

Today all that i can think of to say that i am thankful and praise God for is my brain... Now don't get me wrong, that is not a conceited thing at all... In fact, i would be the first to tell you that i am NOT a book smart person... What i mean by saying that i am thankful for my brain is that i am thankful for the head knowledge that God has given me about who He is... Lately as i have been facing trials i have to admit that i have not felt God near and the "facts" that have been placed in my noggin' from God's Word, or from people or what have you, have been what have kept me from doing something dumb...

I find that lately though since this is something that keeps me somewhat sane, that this is where the battle is really raging... As i pray for people, the flesh rises up and the thoughts that come are really off the wall and not me at all... This has been happening as i have been recieving His Word as well... So hear is my plea to those few who may read this... In Romans it tells us to be transformed by the renewing of our minds... How do we do that... I seriously need a clean slate in my brain... Any thoughts/resources/etc???

blessings,

40 Days of Praise: Day 1

2006-11-17T14:58:00.000-04:00

this is a concept that i have seen in a few other blogs through some friends blogs and i was inspired but knew that i was too undisciplined to do it so i left it with them... now i think it is time for me to step up and do this as an act of praise to my all sufficient God... i will not lie... things have been tough lately and i haven't always reacted in the most graceful manner, but God is still working on me and in me and i can see some areas of breakthrough...

some will be serious and some will be random and i may not be able to do this 40 days in a row, but my goal is to do it mon-fri for the next 8 weeks... life will happen and i am sure that i am painting a target on me for the enemy to come at, but it is great to know that greater is He that is in me than he who attacks me...

so here is day #1 of my 40 days of praise...

i thank God for humour... i realize that a lot of times i take life and myself too seriously but i am thankful for humour and the ability to laugh... not too long ago it was tough to laugh and i felt my joy was all but gone... then God tells me to move back home and little did i know who the Lord had for me to hang out with back home... laughter abounds amongst those who are near to me and for that i am thankful... it is great to experience the silliness in life again and not feel like i am a little kid or less of an adult... God has reminded me that amongst the garbage in life and amongst the responsibilities there can stil be laughter... sweet...

Steep learning curve...

2006-11-15T10:54:00.000-04:00

so here is my thought for the day... is life just one big learning curve??? i compare that to my current job... i love my job right now, but it seems that almost everyday i learn something new about me, my job and how i handle certain situations... i am either learning about autism, my reactions, my shortcomings, spiritual truth or any other thing you can imagine... these lessons come through insightful co-workers, teasing co-workers, my student, my sleeping habits and many other circumstances... the fact of the matter is that i feel that this job is so much bigger than me and all i can do is just try to keep up and make it through today... if that happens then today is a sucess...

so now i wonder if that is what life is??? is life just a series of learning curves??? bad times and good times... they all show us who we are, how we handle things and what we have inside of us... sometimes i get so bent out of shape because things do not go my way as if life is supposed to cator to my every desire... i wonder if all this is just for me to continually learn about stuff... i think that life might be easier to handle if i could have that perspective... if i could wake up each morning focussed on God, ready to learn whatever life was going to teach me today could i more easily put things in the place where they belong and not be consumed by the crap??? would things slide off of my back more easily if i could see each day as a learning curve rather than things that will hold me down for the rest of my days??? just a thought... anywho, add comments if ya want to be serious... if not, i will ponder alone...

and now because i am a man of my word: Today's shout out!!! Tassy is the recipient of my shout out not to be confused with a shout at... someone else may or have got that already... i have to admit that the last time i think i spoke with Cassidy i left with a satisfied cooling sensation and it was good... i could have been the the tornado that she made me or the envigorating conversation... i can't decide... either way, tassy makes me laugh out loud and she is very good at words and stuff... like you know... i can't wait to read the book "Deep Ravines"... anywho tassy, thanks for making me laugh and i can't wait to chat again and perhaps have another creamy icey delightful treat...

p.s.-> stop listening to emo... it rots your teeth...

pushy = persuasion???

2006-10-25T12:59:00.000-03:00

i think i am having one of those times where God is "really" trying to get a message through my thick skull and i may be starting to get it... as of late this message has been shown to me through our young adult Bible study, my bill hybels book, rob bell's bullhorn sermon and just in the fact that it is so darn tough for me to naturally share God's love to those around me... could this be tough because sharing God's love does not require preaching at someone??? things that make you go hmmmmmmm...

where did we ever come up with the concept of getting in someones face and forcing stuff on them is the way to show God's love and change lives for the better... i know that whenever someone comes at me with a pushy, i know better than you attitude about anything i am automatically defensive... maybe this is why i have never bought a ginsu yet... or maybe i have not bought some ginsu knives yet because i fear that i would be tempted to cut my shoes in half...

funny how those of us who are Christ followers want so badly to share Christ with people, yet when we attempt to do it, we leave Christ out of it... actually not funny... probably one of the most sobering questions that i have had to ask myself lately has been "how many people have i pushed away from God by misrepresenting my Savior?" yuck, that is a gross question...

it is interesting i find that in this time when it seems that i have been separated from my closest friends that God would bring some of this revelation to me... it is amazing to me that when i get out of my comfort zone socially God opens up other natural opportunities to get to know others who are not yet serving Him...

and still i find myself in a rush... a door opens, i somewhat shyly walk through and then when the conversation begins my mind races to that sweet, sweet moment when we will all sing the last verse of "just as i am" and this person will give their life to the only one who "really" gives life and as my mind spins and races i have totally missed what this person says to me... perhaps this is why scripture says "be slow to speak and be quick to listen"... and all God's people said, "DUH!!!"

it is awesome when we begin to get past our selfish agendas and leave room for God to show Himself... "be still and know that I am God" now tells me that when i shut up and know that He is God I leave room for Him to show that He is God too...

so here is my underlying thought after all that: may we as God's people be quiet, slow down, get out of our comfy bubbles, and "really" love people... no, really...

* this star is here because i started with two stars and then three so i prequilled the pattern... i don't know... move on...
** and for the record, i know that there have been good times when i have loved people without forcing the Gospel uncomfortably, so this is not totally a scottie bashing rant... just some of the thoughts that i have been pondering lately...
*** it has been a while since i have given a shout out, but i want to give one today... ***

today's shout out goes to someone who i made it a point to try to avoid on the second Bama trip... due to strong personalities i did clash with this person, but i love how God is bigger than that... this person is someone who has totally challenged me to lose my ministry voice, get out of control and allow God to make me the man that He wants me to be... be real huh??? what a concept... this person's passion for reaching out and loving people has sparked a new love for people in me... (of course this is in corraletion with the Spirit's leading as well) this persons honesty and ability to say what is on their mind is very much appreciated despite the fact that at one point it was not... in case you have not figured it out yet, my shout out today goes to none other than Stephanie "not neves" Fitzsimmons... thank you teacher...

Rock on!!!

2006-10-13T15:32:00.000-03:00

so i have been thinking about starting a new death metal worship band for those that know me of course the name will have to be "torn meniscus"... i mean is there anything that term cannot do... it causes me great pain while driving to the hoop in basketball or driving sidney to sussex on a sunny day... it causes people to laugh as the words just leave my mouth... it works as a way of calming a flustered teen basketball player to get back on track... if only it could slice and dice and cut through a shoe... then i could market that term and there would be nothing it couldn't do... so instead i will just name the newest greatest death metal worship band this beautiful pair of words and allow nations to be blessed by the torn meniscus...
truth be told, i don't know if i got it or not, but whatever it is, it hurts...

here's a thought to chew on that may just be for me, but probably not just for me...
"if i moved the people on Grand Manan to Alabama, would i have an easier time talking, loving and ministering to them???"

so challenged...

2006-10-05T14:52:00.000-03:00

not much to say for me, but i wanted to update this week... so here is my nugget of wisdom... read this blog... this man is awesome and got a God perspective on things... i am sick of sitting on my hands spiritually and seeing Christains doing the same, but i guess i am only acountable for me... it is time for action... read this man's words and hear his heart and be blessed...

www.woodscott.blogspot.com

in case anybody cares...

2006-09-28T10:48:00.000-03:00

here are some predictions that i was thinking about for some reason last week...

World Series: New York Mets over Oakland Athletics

Superbowl: Baltimore Ravens over Chicago Bears (ugh)

Stanley Cup: Buffalo Sabres over Aneheim Ducks

NBA Championship: Phoenix Suns over Miami Heat

so there ya go... mark it down...

real or no real???

2006-09-25T16:00:00.000-03:00

i think i am starting a new contest that i may periodically have on this blog now just to get the creative juices flowing out there... now many of you have heard of the game show deal or no deal, but mine is called real or no real...

the object of this game is for all you witty, ingenious types to tell me if the picture that you see is real or no real and give me a totally creative reason why... bonus points for the person who tells me a the funniest story of how this person place or thing got the way that it is...

Eureka!!!

2006-09-18T15:25:00.000-03:00

i have done it!!! i have created the newest and most amazing movie ever... i have titled it "Snakes in a Toilet"... i would tell you who the star is, but i do not want to ruin the surprise... i will give you a hint... he is inside the snake... guess who it is if you would like... you may or may not get it... the storyline will be second to none and it will be a totally mind boggling experience for all to enjoy... oh, to think that all my financial woes will soon be a distant memory...

don't worry... i will not forget the little people who got me to where i am today... thank you oompa loompas...

2006-09-14T16:21:00.000-03:00

so i have been a hard core slogger as of late, but i have not been alone so i do not feel too badly about it i guess... so apparently one has to email kirkly to get a magnificent picture sent back... perhaps if i send him one i can get some pics of hillsong sent to me... or even better, some of their music... okay, this concludes scottie's selfish monologue about kirk perry...

as you can tell by my masterful art at the top of this post i have begun my new job... to put it shortly, I LOVE IT!!! the kids are amazing, the staff is great and it seems that all go to church... that is kind of cool and unique if you ask me... i am actually thinking of taking a tent to white head some night before the winter and camping out over there and then playing softball with some fellas... whoa... who'd of thunk that i would enjoy that place so much... God is good...

now i just need to get healthy again... but i digress... anywho, that is the best i've got for now so peace and be blessed all who read this... and if you do not read this you can be blessed too, but you just don't know it because you didn't read this...

ciao...

best idea of what this is gets a shout out on the next post... ooh, the honor of it all...

quick update before departure...

2006-08-21T11:25:00.000-03:00

so this is it for a few days...

on the 1:30 boat kirkly "kitchen concussion" perry and myself are leaving for another island to be seminar speakers for tuesday and wednesday morning at Caton's Island teen camp... it will be fun to get away for a couple of days, but as always i am going to be glad to get back and for things to start moving again...

as projected, the Devil Rays did in fact lose and their season is over... i was pulled from the second inning and had to watch this happen which hurt almost as much as my pulled muscle did... what a pain in the butt... pun totally intended... next year, new name, new attitude, new players, new results...

went to cassidy's party and had a splendid time... enjoyed the food, fellowship and watching cory burn stuff... no really i did... i like cory a lot... he is a super kid and totally an adventurous boy through and through... love it...

speaking of boy's i talked with my 9 year old boy on saturday morning to wish him a happy birthday and to tell him that i missed and loved him... good times, good times... on a funny note, i asked him what he wanted for his birthday and he told me a portable DVD player... that made me faint and laugh all at the same time...

and last but not least i want to ask for prayer regarding a subject... i am feeling that i am supposed to start a men's study group this fall... i have bounced back and forth with this idea one day thinking that it is a good idea and the next thinking that it is not... already there is a good men's bible study group that i think all the men attend anyway... i am not sure... this would be a saturday breakfast group that would meet once a month over an 8 month period and the study is based on "John Eldrige's" book "Wild at Heart"... i have been going through it lately and went through the DVD's it was awesome... it has shown me where i truly let my wife down in our marriage and shown me some areas that i really need to step up in... i think i want to do this, but only if the Lord would have me do it... any thoughts???

just because i wanted to put something up to date...

2006-08-17T12:21:00.000-03:00

who are you here??? the little boy or the tire??? there is your deep thought of the day...

well i have to admit that i thought for sure the devil rays were going to pull off an upset last night over the mariners, or at least make it a competitive game, but in the 4th and 5th innings, the wheels fell off... kind of disappointing... in other words, if we do not win on saturday our season is over...

on a related note, i am old... from running around in the outfield last night i have many muscles in my legs and butt that are either pulled or really stretched because they are in some massive pain today... it hurts to stand, it hurts to sit... can anybody come up with a posture that i could take that would not hurt??? if so i got an ice cream with your name on it...

i have to admit that i am looking forward to this month being over... just ready to move on a bit... i will see my boys next month and start another job next month so i am a bit excited for next month...

lee turns 9 on this saturday... he is so big and growing so much... i can't believe that his shoe size is only 3 sizes smaller than mine... crazy... yeah, in case ya haven't guessed it, i miss my boys... but God will give me strength...

next post will have much more interesting stories and "probably" no baseball talk so be ready for awesomeness to be on it's way... er, uh, yeah...

blessings ya'll,
love ya...
scottie

p.s.-> go to cassidy's birthday...

last month before structure... i hope...

2006-08-09T11:34:00.000-03:00

i have to admit that this has been a great summer... the freedom that i have had to work with sid and do other ministries has been a real treat... we have travelled, done seminars, hung out on the beach, etc... i love it...

but i have to admit that i am looking forward to some structure in the fall... when my new job starts it means a lot of things to me... it means that i will have something to do in the day which is exciting... it means that i can invest in a young boy during the day and then pick up sid and invest in him til he goes to bed... it also means that there my life will be a lot more scheduled... don't get me wrong, freedom is good, but i get a little stir crazy sometimes... it also means that financially i get to keep up with the bills and send $$$ to my children... i have hated not being able to do that very often... so as this new adventure begins at the end of the month i have to say that i am quite excited and truly looking forward to it arriving quickly...

now for a shout out... it has been a little while since i have given one out... yes, yes, to steal a mark brewer term, i have been a slogger...

today's shout out goes out to two people... today's shout out goes to kim "PP" rayner and stephanie "not neves" fitzsimmons... the reason for them to recieve such and accolade is this: "SERVANT'S HEART"

i have wanted to do more servanthood, but due to my slackerness just didn't get around to it... as of late it has been awesome to have these two ladies be the voice that says let's do this and the boot to my lazy butt to get this servant stuff moving... i just know that there will be more to come as a see these 2 gals taking the lead on a real cool journey for the young adult Christians on GM... there is so much hurting here now and so many questions that the door is wide open for the love of Christ to be spread... so i say thanks to not neves and pp for getting us going and being determined in this pursuit in serving...

"this may or may not be pp and not neves"

some highlights...

2006-07-28T12:13:00.000-03:00

this will be in a list format since i do not really feel like blogging, but feel that i must since it has been a while...

1) my baby said thank you daddy the saturday before beulah... totally made my life... in fact that one line from vaughn has inspired a sermon... it is such a blessing whenever i get to see the boys...

2) beulah was sweet... it was so good to see some old college buddies and though the time there was brief it was awesome to catch up...

3) white water rafting was sweet... i am so thankful that my mom basically made me go... i was not going to and she told me that whether i liked it or not, she was going to bless me by paying for me... there was a bit of resistance to that idea, but in this case i am glad that momma bear won the battle... it was a blast until i got caught in the white water toilet from hell, but now that i am out, it makes a good story i suppose... probably a good sermon illustration somehow... embarassing stories of me usually are... ugh...

4) after being home for less than 24 hours, sid and i left again and i was able to spend 2 days on caton's sharing a seminar on worship... monday and tuesday morning were my alotted times and it was a good experience... a real growing time in terms of my speaking skills i think... it was truly awesome to spend this time on caton's with tim, sidney (yendis yoj), jason and tyrone... we had a blast and met some amazing people...

5) the TSA concert was great... i loved playing and "them and her" or whatever they were called did great, but TSA is really getting good... plus they are all beautiful human beings who love the Lord and it is evident... good on ya fellas...

6) then i took sid to sussex which means that i can rest this weekend, which i am super stoked about... oh yeah, this weekend is my 10th highschool reunion as well... gonna be fun... on sunday i am blessed with the privelege of leading worship twice, and preaching at my reunion service... huge honor... so i guess i don't get to rest after all...

7) that's all... enjoy the pic... you now know more about my life than i do... love ya'll...

concerning this weekends adventure...

2006-07-19T11:50:00.000-03:00

needless to say i am a bit excited... now this is not the penobscot ingalls river that we will be travelling on, but i am still pretty stoked about this whole thing... i am sure these pics are from a class 12 or 13 or something... can't wait, can't wait, can't wait... hopefully pics to come after the weekend...
glenn out...

Chronicles of Glenn. Part I of I

2006-07-17T10:36:00.000-03:00

so here we are back on good ole manan planning our next escape for more adventures to be had...

beulah was fun and relaxing despite having to keep track of sid as he became mr. popularity... that kid is amazing... social butterfly to the max...

i also met my newest alter ego; glenn green... this was an attempted prank on a certain nemesis of mine that was actually planned by his own family members... i was not sure about this because i thought that he had already seen my pic on a football pool, but his family members gave him no credit at all... neither did a certain pastor buddy of his who tends to be very nemesy towards me as well during sports pools... but alas, despite their lack of faith in this person, he figured it out rather quickly... it was rather odd i must admit actually talking to this fantom trash talker that i had never met, but we made due and i am sure that for the rest of the year the bashing will continue... oh joy, oh bliss...

now on to the bad news of the week... i saw a trailer for a movie that made me say, you have got to be kidding... "snakes on a plane", that's right, "snakes on a plane"... apparently this is about a prisoner or escaped convict on a plane who wants to get away or something and his strategy is to let loose all kinds of poisonous snakes... so our hero, samuel l. jackson must battle the snakes to save the passengers... or something like that.... give me a break... so this is my must not watch of the summer... if you do decide to watch it, let me know how dumb it was... or was not... either way...

glenn out...

enjoy the massive picture that i have provided for all ya'll...

must watch of the summer...

2006-07-06T11:59:00.000-03:00

now i have to admit that i was a bit skeptical as i sat and watched this show due to last years success and the fact that there are three members of three :"formerly" huge bands forming one, but i was pleasantly surprised... i am not really a tv analyist by any means, but i really have to say that i am looking forward to watching "rockstar supernova"...

for those who do not know what this is about it is the second season of a hit from last year... last years show was inxs attempting to find a new lead singer and a good ole maritimer ended up winning the competition... good on ya jd...

so this year's concept is similar, except that we now have 3 rockers forming what some have called a super band... that remains to be seen, but if they feed off of any of the good singers from last night their music could suck and they would still make out alright... there is some amazing talent in this years show so it should be fun to watch... and for the record the musicians are none other than tommy lee (former drummer from motley crue), Jason Newsted (former bass player from Metallica), and Gilby Clark (former guitar player from Guns n Roses)... this band is also being lead by Butch Walker... don't know much about him, but if he is the same guy that kirk talked about in moncton, that should make things fun...

so there you have it... amazing performances, an incredible house band and the wit and humour of three rockers trying to find the right singer is what makes "Rockstar Supernova" my pick for the must watch of the summer...

pardon the hockey talk...

2006-07-04T12:28:00.000-03:00

with deepest apologies to those who do not appreciate the hockey talk i want to give today's shout out to in my opinion the greatest captain in the nhl... very rarely do you see in todays professional sports one individual staying with one team for their career... "stevie y" demonstrated what it meant to be a great leader and a classy individual in the NHL... what a great career, what a great person...

i wonder what my autographed steve yzerman card is worth now???

today's shout out is a no doubter...

2006-06-30T01:33:00.000-03:00

it is one thirtyish and i am thus unable to go to sleep so what do i do??? i blog... that is right... i am back on the wagon hardcore...

well today was a long day and it would have been a much longer day had it not been for the recipient of today's shout out... it has been a couple posts since i have given one, but today's shout outee is very deserving for many reasons...

shall i begin: i have known this person for a very long time and we have certainly had our ups and downs, but our love has lasted through the bull snot of life... there have been many competitions between us and despite the heated rivalries that have been formed we now have the ability to get past the winning losing thing and just appreciate each other... i was able to see a transformation in this person's life over this past year as he gave his life to the Lord after much prayer by me and other members of my family... despite the fact that this person was once smaller than me and now has grown up much larger, i will always be very protective of this person... this fact is true even though i used to pick on this person unmercifully and even have a catch with them... not like catch with them with a ball... (although we did do that and still do) i literally used to have a catch with "this person"... yes i threw this person and later attempted to catch them again... not always successfully i might add... whoops... rabbitt trail there... ahem... this person will always be someone close to me who i love and appreciate despite the fact that i could strangle them somedays... i am sure that sentiment is mutual... and finally my shout out goes out to this person because when it seemed like the rest of grand manan was a ghost town or raptured or was playing a really big game of hide and seek, he took his only day off in about a million days and helped me move all of my belongings from north head to seal cove... and incase you have not figured out who my shout out goes to today...

here is your final hint...

Love ya Bro!!!

hold still...

2006-06-29T11:39:00.000-03:00

well, i hope that this is it for a good little while... i would say that i am as big a fan of moving as i am interviews... not on my top 120 things to do list... but i guess i cannot complain since in the last week the Lord has provided me with another job and a place to live... so hopefully i will be landed now for a little bit and achieve some stability in my life... i am truly thankful for the blessings the Lord provides... as for now, i will be packing and unpacking... if you wanna help, give me a call... that's all...

not a member of the interview fan club...

2006-06-26T10:16:00.000-03:00

this will be brief because i hate to torture those whom find so much in my words to jump on, but i will share because others have pressured me to do so...

so as you can tell from my title, i am not the biggest fan of interviews... i had one today and once again i say, i hate them... the thing that gets me is this... i used to be good at them... what happened? did not getting a couple of jobs that i interviewed for really shatter my confidence that badly? i don't know...

i just wish that there was a way for people to see in a visual way someone's passions, gifts, talents and the like... the interview setting seems so fake and even though people say "just be yourself" there is pressure to be better than that... i hate that... myself is so frigging good at what he does, and yet i feel like that does not match up once i sit down and talk to people in this setting... my pic above demonstrates how i feel once things get going... i am the branch...

so anywho, this is my post... funny? not for me... interesting? not so much... real? that it is...

have a wonderful day all... love you all...

scottie

Reflections...

2006-06-09T14:33:00.000-03:00

today i am in a reflective mood so there will be no shout outs, unless they go to Jesus and if that is a problem, your issue is not with me... k... so i just finished a week of one on one mentoring, T.A.ing, and tutoring and it has done some things in my mind... beside the thought of our children's education being in trouble with my helping them, i have discovered that i love mentoring... i think i knew this, but being around groups of people (friend, church, classrooms, youth groups, etc...) i have forgotten the value of the one on one time... in today's culture it is so taboo for an adult to have a mentoring role with a young person because some idiot's have ruined it by perverting in ways that will not be discussed... (but we know) nobody trusts anybody anymore because of these things and i have to believe that satan (piece of crap) loves it this way... well i for one will not stand for this... as of late, God has given me a passion for the one on one mentoring role and i think perhaps i may try to find other avenues to persue this passion...

i think we as adults have so much to offer teens and children today, but we do not because we are too affraid, too busy, too uncomfortable or any other lame excuse... what are we affraid of??? making a difference??? i was blessed as a teenager to have many mentors who i knew cared about me and i could chat with them at any time and sometimes i am sure that i did even though it was inconveinent for the adult... yet they still listened...

now i know that i said i was not going to give shout outs in this post, but i have officially changed my mind and hey, it is my blog right? so i guess i can do that... my shout out first off goes to Jesus for loving, providing and mentoring me by His example... also for sending these mentors in my life who at one point or another have been an awesome example in my life: frank and gloria trail, scott and sharon lewis, danny and wendy linton, eliot shepherd, julie shepherd, teena ingersoll, sherri urquhart, rhonda hettrick, troy russell...*** thanks all and i love you... you will never know... i trust that i can only try to make the difference that you have made in me...

*** - this list is only my list of youth leaders while i was in school... many more from other points in my life could and may be added at a later day... ***

for those who are having a bad day... STOP IT!!!

2006-06-01T14:09:00.001-03:00

uh, what can you say?
Originally uploaded by lepracaun.rm.

baglady
Originally uploaded by lepracaun.rm.

speed bump
Originally uploaded by lepracaun.rm.

insert thought here...
Originally uploaded by lepracaun.rm.

yeah, enough said... i complain, you complain, we all complain... complaining stinks... amen, amen... go eat lunch...

today's shout out goes out to people who take funny pictures and put them on the internet... oh, i could look and laugh for hours... if i see another cat in a fishbowl or a person being kicked in the groin i just might explode... it is too much really... phew... catching breath now...

hey i wonder how someone becomes a funny picture taker for the internet??? could i do that for a job??? what would it pay??? hmmmm.... i guess i better buy a camera... now i will be rich and famous with my beloved disposable camera... way to go picture taking types... you inspire me and for that you get today's "shout out"...

may or may not be mine...

2006-05-31T14:56:00.000-03:00

fastgrowing
Originally uploaded by lepracaun.rm.

with fathers day coming up real soon i thought that it was getting on to that time when i should post a picture that may or may not be of my kids... okay, just kidding... definately not my kid... vaughn knows that it is playoff time in the nba and nhl and you do not shave your playoff beard...

but seriously sports fans it is an overcast day hear on good ole GM and the men's baseball league is a full week into it's season... (the masses rejoice) on that note the devil rays (worst name ever) are looking to have a much improved season than their first one last year... who knows what this summer will bring???

now speaking of the devil rays that reminds me of dan boyd... dan boyd reminds me of chris stephens website... what is the connection you may ask and i know that you all are... shout outs, that is the connection... as a new segment on my world famous blog i will incorporate shout outs to people all over the world and then explain why i am shouting at them...

so my first shout out goes to... my mom...

my mom visited geoff and i this weekend past and brought one of my nefews and one of my nieces... they are cute and i loved playing with them, but i have to say that the number one reason i am giving my mom a shout out is because she gave birth the the 2 bestest boys in the whole wide world... yay for my mom... that right scott ingalls, my mom deserves a shout out...

My new favorite song...

2006-05-14T14:42:00.000-03:00

You Never Let Go
by Matt Redman

verse
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I am caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won't turn back, I know You are near

pre chorus
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear, whom then shall I fear

chorus
Oh no, You never let go. Through the calm and through the storm.
Oh no, You never let go. In every high and ever low.
Oh no, You never let go. Lord You never let go of me.

verse
And I can see the light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
There will be an end to these troubles, but until that day comes
We'll live to know You here on the earth

pre chorus
chorus

bridge
And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles, but until that day comes
Still I will praise You
Still I will praise You

To Be A Kid Again...

2006-05-12T11:01:00.000-03:00

it is a rainy, gross day and yet the peace that God gives is still evident to me... what a neat place to be... (did i just say neat?) anywho as i walked into the school i saw a class of younger kids running to the gym for their phys ed class... the looks on their faces was priceless... innocence... what was on their mind??? get to the gym, get to the gym, get to the gym... the excitement was written all over them...

yet as i say this unrestricted, overwhelming, uncontrolled joy i got to thinking about what happens as they got older... even as teens they will face choices that i may have not even faced yet and the heartbreak that could be theirs to deal with scares me... then i thought about these little ones and what they may face as adults someday... to be honest it broke my heart thinking about it...

then i was challenged... for whatever reason, God has called me to stay on Grand Manan and invest myself into the young people here... the crazy thing to me is that there is influence that God has given me too... this i may never understand, but i am thankful... i want to pray like nehemiah as i think of this... God, increase my favor with man in this place... as i think of a potential youth/rec center, as i think of hurting teens, as i think of little children who don't even know what is headed their way i am challenged... with great blessing comes great responsibility...

i have said this before, but it was in regards to finances and the gulf coast... now i am definately not in a place of financial greatness, but God has blessed me in other areas of life... in the past i have had amazing youth leaders that believed in me and did not give up on me, even when i was a jerk... now today, i have a group of amazing friends who support me in the good and bad and in my good and bad... so the challenge for me is this: will i walk in faith, whatever that means, doing what God wants me to do on this island... as He increases my favor, my influence with people, will i be obedient???

will we as God's people stop buying the lies and walk confidently and boldly as God directs... as i think back to these little ones scrambling to gym class without a care in the world, God asked me, "Are you ready to make an impact?"

Are we???

pick your battles i suppose...

2006-05-04T09:15:00.000-03:00

for those of you who were blessed by seeing my kids, i will have to email the pics to you... God has taught me a lot about myself and my responses to things lately...

once again, i can be having a good day and the enemy (not a person) sets those little snares again... but i have a choice in this battle... i do not have to be defeated and let crap keep me down for God has promised me things and that is what i will cling to...

i think there are some though too that we just do not have to fight... this is a good example... some would say that i am being a wus and allowing people to push me around, but i don't think so... i feel that i need to pick my battles and this one may not be worth fighting... why antagoize?? it will be worth sitting back and allowing God to lead in this situation down the road and actually He is today because He gives peace... there once was a day when this type of thing would consume me for days and just mess me up because it would frustrate me so, but not today... "where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom..." i am not bound by bitterness...

this is definately not a scottie promotional thing either... this freedom from all these snares is there for all those who are in Christ Jesus and that ain't just me... rest in God and let Him give you peace; even in your most frustrating times... He will...

and thanks lisa... they are beautiful boys aren't they... i love my boys...

2006-05-01T12:14:00.000-03:00

first off i have to apologize for the sloppiness of the way these pics are posted... i am still experimenting on how to do this... but i had to show off my babies... finally... please pray because i miss them dearly...

so i found my wallet on sunday and saturday night we had an amazing service... started at about 7 and ended at about 11:30ish... the Holy Spirit fell and it was amazing to witness God doing business with His children in all kind of different ways and areas in their lives... very humbling experience as a worship leader... i love the intensity of the room when God begins to work and move and how in the midst of this extreme intensity, there is such a sense of peace... words cannot explain... i believe we are not finally hitting the tip of the ice burg now...

and to close of this post i just wanted to say "Cassidy rocks!!!"
wow, that did make it more exciting...
along with my kids pics...
peace...

Leightony Snickets Series of Unfortunated Events...

2006-04-29T17:34:00.000-03:00

to start on a postive note, tim and i coach the high school girls volleyball team and it has been a blast... i am not really much of a volleyball player or a coach of the sport yet somehow tim roped me into helping him a while back... what a fun thing to do... the girls that we have been able to get to know through this are amazing and i have had so much fun coaching them... so this season was kind of a lengthy one with one whole regular season game and then on thursday we had our opening playoff tournament to determine the seedings in our conference... to make a long story a little less long, we won our bracket and played harvey in the finals of this tourney... we won the first game, lost a close one the second and lost an even closer one in the third game... we came in second place in our conference... how awesome was that!!! the girls have worked so hard and we have kept the game very simple while we have worked on the basics and they have improved so much... so now we move on to the next round of the playoffs... more news at 11 or so...

on to the next point which could be taken seriously, but i kind of want to laugh so don't take it seriously... last week (saturday) i was on my way to the church to lead worship in our churches contemporary service and while i was driving my grandma's car half of what was holding her gas tank up came undone... now i would never claim to be a mechanic, but i know that is not good at all...

now on to this week... being that i don't have a ride as of yet (my own broken down vehicle) and my grandma's broke under me i had to walk to the church today... as i was walking down the island there were a couple of people who stopped and helped me along the way... i did manage to walk quite a distance, but the rides were appreciated... as i was dropped off at the one of the local restaurants i got out and began to reach for my wallet so i could have lunch... uh oh... not in my pockets or in my bag... so a this point it is so far not at the store i last used it at or in one of the two vehicles that i travelled in... one more to check out...

sometimes i have these things happen to me and i just laugh as if to say what's next, but then other days i just want to swear... it seems that this has been the pattern in my life ever since emily requested that i pack up my stuff and move out of our marriage (2years, 4 mos)... one thing that i have been learning a lot lately is about the authority that God gives His children and that we do not have to live intimidated, defeated lives... today serves as a good reminder though that satan "still" does not care about all that and will do whatever he can to distract from what God would have us do in our daily walk in that authority...

this could be another distraction from the enemy as i prepare to lead worship tonight or it could just be my clumsiness, but i guess the choice is mine to decide how i am going to let this affect me... will i allow it to consume my mind and keep me from experiencing intimacy with my Savior tonight as we worship together or will i worship God despite this annoying little event that seems so big as it is added to the pile of events that i have faced... fortunately, my personality has some stubborness in it... the wallet will be found... the jeep will run again someday... the job will happen... the housing will come into fruition and my boys WILL know and spend time with their father...

although somedays i laugh and wonder where is God in all of this i know that His word says that He will never leave or forsake me... i am not forgotten...

neither are you... does this hit close to home?
tell me your story...

waiting...

2006-04-25T13:16:00.000-03:00

so here it is... simply put, God sent me an e-mail... there was a lady who has visited the island at some point last year and a couple of weeks ago she sent an email to a lady on the island specifically telling her about my situation and that the Lord wanted me to stop and wait... (also known as don't move) let the Holy Spirit guide me here and listen for Him...

i asked God for bright red letters in the sky (kind of humourously) and He sent me an email...

so here i am waiting... an email has been sent to a president of a large ministry which works with youth and setting up youth centers and i am now waiting to hear back, trying to live a day at a time as the spirit leads... i love the freedom in this role so i can minister to the teens on the island, but finances always seems to be in the back of my mind... i want my sons to be a part of my life here as well and that does not seem to be a reality without the dough...

i must say though that i have a lot less noise in my brain knowing where the Lord wants me to be... i can now try to settle and establish myself in this community better... here we go...

subtle and silly...

2006-04-13T22:58:00.000-03:00

mental note... next post is about psalm 127:1... in that post i will share about how God spoke to me about direction...

on to tonights thoughts... if you don't like serious posts i don't apologize... this is what God is bringing me through so this is what i share...

lately i have been experiencing and believing in the authority that God has equipped me with for a while now... so now that i choose to accept this gift and walk in it the opportunities to share with people have been plentiful... i feel so useful for the first time in a while... it is cool... yet the battle rages on... but this week it is different... usually i get pretty bombarded with a lot of heavy stuff and it is intense... in the past 24 hours i have had two insignificant things happen that really opened up some emotions of being upset and offended... for those who have been under the teaching of john bevere's "bait of satan" you know how nasty offence can be and how big the wedges it can cause... the things that set me off were so silly though... first, i was with some friends and another friend called and they spoke with 2 others and not me and that go me so upset... the thing is that i spoke with this person over msn so i should not have been upset in the first place and if i didn't it is still nothing to get upset over... so subtle... the second instance was while i was picking songs to lead worship another person whom i was speaking with suggested picking songs that were familiar... that got under my skin so badly it is ridiculous... i know what they meant, but i took it as "you have done a bad job picking songs in the past, so please do better"... so subtle...

even today i am just feeling overwhelmed a bit which is odd... instead of being totally crushed with another nasty blow, i just feel held down a bit... it is almost like the enemy knows the ground that i am taking back in my life and is subtly annoying me to hold me down a bit... so annoying... frig...

but the joy is this... the saints are surrounding me and God has not stopped being there... sounds so cliche, but is so true... when i am weak, He is strong and that is all i have to rely on...

not a real earth shaking post, but it is honest and that is what i wanted to be tonight... the enemy is sneaky and will do the little things that will eventually try to destroy us... great news is that he has no authority for those who are in Christ so i will not be destroyed... heck, i may even pull through... Praise God...

not what i planned on typing at all...

2006-04-10T11:36:00.000-03:00

once again i have been told that i have been lazy with my posting here and once again the masses are right...

extreme discipleship was here last weekend and i have to say that it was an amazing weekend... many of our youth and youth leaders have really been under attack since the return of the alabama trip and this weekend was really needed... the last 2 weeks at youth group we have had to call the ambulance and have teens carted out on a stretcher... to put it mildly our kids are moving and satan is not happy...

i guess i would like to ask for those out there who know me and are not from GM to lift up our island teens in prayer... i have seen what the enemy is trying to do to thwart God's movement on this island and he is pulling no punches... physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually our kids are getting the brunt of some intense spiritual warfare like i have never seen before...

pray that our teens and leaders would accept and live in the victory that God has given us and know that God has not given them a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power and a sound mind... (peace) pray that they would know and live out boldly because that same spirit that was in Jesus is in them and they do not have to be defeated in this battle... yet it is a battle and it is getting intense...

i am so proud of these kids for their stand that they are taking, but they need so much more than what they have to offer... we all do... we did do some battle this weekend and i believe that a lot of people did take back some ground that the enemy has stolen, but there is so much more...

i love the kids here and i have learned that this is where the Lord wants me to be so i may continue to equip these teens to fight this battle for their minds, bodies, hearts and souls... i will tell the amazing story of what happened to get me to this realization later on when some of the details play themselves out a bit, but i am asking you who reads this right now... intercede and fast (if you are lead) for the young people of grand manan... they are fighting a battle and need the strength to come out of this victorious... God will and is providing, but we seriously love and appreciate your prayers for our kids...

get your sails up, get your sails up... c'mon party people, get your sails up...

2006-03-23T14:41:00.000-04:00

you ever think you are doing awesome with your walk with the Lord and then it hits you, or is revealed to you that you may not be doing so well...

yes that is where i am at right now... God has totally empowered me lately since the alabama trip (or at least i am claiming the authority finally) but there has been an internal struggle for me as of late... while i feel that i have a great impact with the ministry here on Grand Manan, i have been wrestling with whether or not i am to take a church as a pastor... that desire has always been there, but i feel that God has wanted me here for a season and now i am facing that choice again...

while we were on our way to and from alabama a church that we stayed in really left it's mark with me and since being home i have found out that they are hiring a full time youth/young adults director... to say the least i am so intrigued that my stomach has been in knots and i struggle to get this posibility out of my mind...

yet here is what is holding me to GM... 1) my kids are in fredericton 2) i love my teens here 3) God has blessed me with an amazing group of friends 4)i love the ministry on the island and where things are going spiritually... yet, financially i have not yet found a fit that has been able to provide me with a full time income that allows me to be a father to my children... so i have been wrestling to say the least...

last night at a service that i went to the preacher spoke about the wind and how scripture often speaks about God being in the wind and how churches often react to the wind of the spirit moving... to make a long sermon not so long i realized that i have been sitting in my boat with my sails down because i am affraid of where that wind may take me... it seems that GM has become a comfort zone to me that i have become emotionally attached to... not a bad thing, but if it gets in the way of what God is doing then we have a problem...

so here is my prayer request... i have some potential options that range between GM and bama... i am going to be faithful to make some phone calls, but i need the
Spirit to lead or more importantly i want my sails up to recieve what the spirit says and then be obedient wherever, or whatever that means...

been a while... i may or may not be sorry...

2006-03-16T13:26:00.000-04:00

so i guess i am due to add a new post here so that people do not think i am dead... actually i have been informed in that i am a selfish blogger... one of my teens who has jumped onto this fad has had her blog disappear and by me having one and not using it i guess makes me unthankful... actually she did not say that, but it does kind of make sense somehow...

so let's go way back:
our superbowl party went pretty well... the senior boys basketball team was away that weekend so that took away them, their friends and senior girls and despite all that we still had 85 or so teens there... now try to imagine 85 junior highers in one small building with lots of sugar in their system... oh yes, it was that insane... but it was good and the kids were given an alternative place to be where there were wonderful good influences like me all around... i am making this sound less and less inspiring aren't i???

after that things began to go downhill a bit and i guess i kind of let stuff get to me... there was a one week period where i had my water pipes in my house freeze and break, my transmission in my jeep seized up, i got the flu and was up all night puking and pooping (there is just no way to say that nicely), and i was laid off at the boys and girls club... this took quite the toll on my mind but as a look back it makes sense because i was about to lead a group of 42 individuals from grand manan to the gulf coast for some hurricane relief work... this was my 2nd trip and many peoples first time on a missions trip... satan really did a number on my mind and my confidence... it was hard to believe that i could do this and as a matter of fact there was a lot of time when i believed that i could not... yet this trip seemed to go by with minimal complications and i had to make tough decisions that i have never had to make before... i could feel God empowering me as people would wonder what we were doing next... once again i learned how big God is and how little i am... i could not lead this trip, yet God chose me and somehow we all made it back and have been changed through this experience...

and now i am back on grand manan kind of wondering what is next... to be honest i am hoping for some full time work, but that is up to God... i will search my options and see where He leads... i guess i am not really worried, but at the same time it would be nice to know... being that this is a big turn around time for the wesleyan church my mind has wondered about looking into taking a church somewhere, but i do not feel a peace about that... i am totally in love with my island teens and church right now and for whatever reason feel that i am not allowed to leave yet... so that being said i have to believe that God has something for me here... surviving leadership on this trip has built a new desire in me to speak to people for God... this goes beyond teens i guess... whoever, wherever, whenever... yikes... but once again this is bigger than me, but not the one who wants to speak through me...

so there... hope ya'll are caught up... more news at 11... or whenever the news happens... love ya'll... talk to me...

SuperBowl Party '06

2006-01-29T23:31:00.000-04:00

seahawks
Originally uploaded by lepracaun.rm.

steelers
Originally uploaded by lepracaun.rm.

aaahhh, it's that time of the year again when everybody who hasn't watched football all year becomes an expert... that is fun...

now here on good ole GM timmy and i are planning our CWY and B&G Club superbowl party... last year there was 120 teens, plus leaders, plus 2 bands, plus fans stuffed in our little boys & girls club...

much fun was had and 1400 hot wings were eaten... good night and relationships were built...

this year will hopefully be no different, but i want to ask you all to pray for this event... yes there will be sweet prizes, fun fear factor games, and a buttload of hot wings and the first ever Grand Manan Madden Bowl, but the best part of this night is going to be building relationships with many, many young people...

please pray as we continue to plan for this... i love how God can use a silly football game and crazy fun events for His glory... Are you ready for some football???

all about perspective... chapter 123...

2006-01-23T23:54:00.000-04:00

so here we go again... let's start from the top, er bottom i guess... i was driving away from men's basketball tonight and was kind of frustrated because i played like stir fried poo poo... so i was a little distracted... today we had snow, which was new as well... to make a long story short i went around a corner (not very fast) and even though i turned the wheel, my jeep did not turn with the wheels... not a positive thing...

so i slid, and i slid, and then i bounced somewhat violently off of the guardrail... my first thought was "oh no, i can't afford this!!!"

then i pulled over and walked around my jeep to survey the damage... to my surprise, there was no major damage... what??? all that was broken was the plastic that was attached to my bumper... no dents on the wheel well, no damage to the side of my jeep, my tire was not wobbeling... to be honest i was shocked... also at the risk of looking dumb, i forgot to wear my seatbelt and i am fine... maybe i should attribute any ditzyness to this traumatic event?

after i saw the lack of damage and began to drive off two thoughts ran through my head... #1 - my mother was right... jeep cherokee's are tough as nails... or at least tougher than guard rails... and #2 - who the heck was praying for me??? was it you??? please let me know so i can thank you if it was...

once again... all about perspective... bad basketball night... who cares???

Faithfulness + Faithfulness = Less Telemarketers???

2006-01-22T01:29:00.000-04:00

so here is my thoughts... pardon me if i get a little vulnerable... i have been struggling as of late and it seems to be a recurring battle... one that i thought i had victory over as a matter of fact...

a very wise person has blessed me with the thought of just being in Christ and to stop trying to be a better Christian... allow myself to be immersed with the presence of the almighty God and let that stir me to be the person that He wants me to be... that is awesome, but... then there is me....

i also had a pretty wise pastor friend teach me that temptation is like those annoying telemarketers that are always trying to sell you that amazing product that you have always wanted and needed, but truthfully will never use... it is so easy to just say no, no, no, no, non, go away, you annoy me, no, then eventually "click", and we hang up...

with respect to my friend of the just be persuasion (i don't think i am disagreeing with you) i had a formula come to mind... faithfulness + faithfulness = less telemarketers... faithfulness to being God's son, soaking up His presence and Word will spur me on to a life (active) of faithfulness... which in turn gives strength to resist the annoying telemarketers of temptation... so i guess there is not less of them and as i think of it, perhaps there is more... formula in progress...

and all of that to say that i need to reunite with my first love and be the son that gives witness to His perfect daddy... hmmmm... let the growing and molding continue i guess... blessings,

scottie

thanks kayla

2006-01-19T11:40:00.000-04:00

so this post is for kayla who so lovingly called me on my slackerness of posting... sadly due to lack of time i will do it in point form...

-MY BABY CALLED ME DADDY ON THE 7TH OF JANUARY!!!!! MERRY FREAKIN' CHRISTMAS SCOTTIE!!! BEST GIFT EVER!!!

-geoff (my bro) went with me to see the kids and we had a great time...

-big news to come on the daddy/divorce front... will keep you posted as things progress...

-as well i had my group of best friends get together and buy me a new acoustic guitar for Christmas... amazing bunch of people whom i love very much... i am blessed because of these guys/gals... and the guitar is a small part of it, although it does open up the door for me to begin leading worship again, which i love to do...

-things have not progressed in the new year as i had originally hoped for work, but something will come... if God still wants me on GM He will provide...

-february 5th is the date for my second superbowl party and it is in the stadium of my favorite team, the detroit lions... too bad the lions aren't even close to making it to the superbowl... ~sigh~

-march 4th-12th marks the return to alabama for myself and as of yesterday we have a group of 54ish people going...

so i hope this is sufficient for those of you with the flaming torches ready to burn me for being a blogger slacker... soon to come; pics of the kids... i can't stand it anymore... i have to show them off... love ya'll...

how to love???

2005-12-14T23:37:00.000-04:00

it is a matter of perspective, but when do you reach the point where enough is enough??? or do you???

i have realized today that my flesh is apparently stronger than my spirit... looking at this i would think that it is because i am feeding one more than the other, but i don't think that is it... the problem seems to be that i am not really feeding either... now i don't know about you, but when i don't get fed i get cranky... so it seems to me that if i am not feeding myself spiritually (whatever that means) i can get cranky which seems to make the flesh more abundant... does this make sense to anyone else??? somehow in my mind it does... the long and short is this... i am not looking forward to Christmas because of that lack of time i will get with my kids and that ticks me off... now as of late i am trying to "speak life" into people and that apparently has painted a target on me...

so because i have not fed my spirit as i should be i become a complaining "bitch" that i do not want to become... how fun is that... sorry for the language...

so here i am being hungry and mad at the world asking how do i get fed and please, no sunday school answers...

it is all about perspective, but didn't even Job wonder what the heck was going on and if it would ever end???

all about perspective...

2005-12-13T11:25:00.000-04:00

so yeah, i have been a super slacker when it comes to posting about the alabama trip, but here it is... i have had a real hard time collecting my thoughts about what i witnessed while i was there... there were a ton of emotions from either side of the spectrum...

i will say this about what we did... it can simply be put as "whatever"... serving was tops our our list and there was plenty of opportunities for that... the majority of what we did as a group was tearing the insides of people's houses apart so they could be bleached and rebuilt...

there are so many stories of things where we could see the hand of God in our trip that i could go on for hours telling them, but i will save that for a later date... what God did in me was, to say the least humbling...

seeing the destruction and hopelessness down in the gulf coast was overwhelming to me and yet i did not want to leave... i was so happy serving these people even though there was a lot of grunt work that i am not used to... yet doing ministry and serving people filled me with joy...

but the main emotion that i came back home with was that i am a very selfish person... as i got back home i realized how much i complain about things that seem big to me, but in the grand scheme of things are not... i complain about my house having no oil and being cold; at least i have a house... i complain about my vehicles always breaking down; at least i have vehicles to break down... i complain about never seeing my kids; at least i know where my kids are and that they are safe...

you see; it is all about perspective and we are often so quick to complain when we are blessed... "with this blessing comes responsibility and this is so much bigger than us..."

i love it...

more updates to come...

here we go...

2005-11-20T21:40:00.000-04:00

dear diary,

i don't know if i am going to be able to sleep tonight, but i will try... so here is the agenda for the next few days...

Monday, November 21st - pack and do 1 million things to get ready for the trip...
7:00 pm - leave on the GM V and get to black's harbout @ 9ish and then head to wales maine... arriving there around 1 AM...

Tuesday, November 22nd - get rental van at 8 am and the we drive drive drive... stop somewhere (not sure where) to get some sleep...

Wednesday, November 23rd - drive, drive, drive and hopefully arrive in Mobile, Alabama that evening...

Thursday, November 24th - serve 600 thanksgiving meals...

beyond that i am not sure what we are doing, but i get the feeling that God is going to continually break my heart with what i am about to see and stand in the middle of... may i be a light Lord that shines for you... all for You...

what it is all about...

2005-11-10T14:22:00.000-04:00

so please forgive me if it seems like i may be bragging during this post, but i am... lately i feel like i am somewhat bipolar due to the fact that my moods seems to stay the same as long as a the weather does... but lately things have been reminding me why i do what i do...

let me explain... last week i was given the opportunity to counsell some people though some stuff and even though immediately things did not plan out the best, today someone came to me and said that they all worked things out... it is so cool that i was able to lay a foundation and then leave it alone and those involved could get through the rest on their own in their time... what a blessing...

then the other night at youth we presented the idea to our teens who were planning on going to a huge rally about the possibility of serving in Alabama in march and the almost immediately decided that they want to serve instead of pursuing their own interests... i was so proud of these teens... words cannot explain it...

so i guess i post this for 2 reasons... first, it serves as a reminder for me to not give up when things suck... there is value in investing and caring even though somedays (like today) it is a big headache... and secondly, i guess i wanted to remind those of you out there who care about people and desire to invest in people to not give up when things get tough and people don't always appreciate your efforts... despite what you feel, there are people who do care and do appreciated... hang in there and keep trudging through the muck...

we are going...

2005-11-03T22:17:00.000-04:00

man it has been a while since i have left a post on this site... if there are those of you who actually check this, i am sorry for my slackness...

i guess the biggest thing that i have to say in this one is that i am alabama bound... tim branscombe and myself have been chatting and feel like it is time for us to step up and represent Christ in the "gulf area" of the southern united states... to make a long story not so long we are heading for alabama in about 3 weeks for american thanksgiving to serve those down there who are in need and there is a lot... am i excited??? yes i am... scared? you bet... do i have any idea where the money is coming from??? not a clue, but God is faithful and $400 is pocket lint to my saviour...

if you want to join on and come with us during this amazing opportunity, please let me know... if you would like to support me financially or prayerfully, that would be greatly appreciated as all this is needed... once again, this is something that is so much bigger than me, but God is faithful and will lead the way...
sweet home alabama here we come... we may not be able to handle it all, but as God is our strength we will do what we can and bring souls to Christ... i can't wait...

i can relate, i can relate....

2005-10-07T18:51:00.000-03:00

okay, this begins a little humbling, but it has a point... so it was a rainy afternoon and i finished up a band practice and went home to rest before teen night... while i was home resting i decided to channel surf... as i did i came across Oprah... now i don't usually watch Oprah, but i noticed that her guest was going to be Uma Thurman... after seeing this i decided to leave it on that channel... it could be that i secretly have decided that i am going to marry her, but nobody is suppose to know that yet...

anywho as she spoke with the talk show diva they talked about Uma's recent divorce and for the first time in my life i felt like i could relate to a celebrity... as she spoke she seemed very real... it was like her pain was the great equalizer... i felt like if i were there we could speak and actually with each other... seeing this famous movie star speaking very honestly and very painfully brought back some emotions for me and reminded me of what i have to come in terms of finalizing stuff...

so here is my point... "pain is pain..." how is that for deep thoughts??? on a day that i have been missing my little boys and have been feeling pretty alone i see someone who is dealing with pain and hurt too... my heart broke for uma as a could relate to what she was feeling... none of us are exempt, none of us are free from pain... this is a fact, but despite this pain the ultimate truth is that "God is God" and he cares for our hurts and pains... sometimes it is the simple things that i so easily forget, but it is still true... so here i sit still missing my boys trusting that we will be united someday saying that "uma, i praying for you..." YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!

for goodness sake, do something...

2005-09-24T02:05:00.000-03:00

okay,

i have to admit that i have watched more news last night and today than i probably have my whole life... i cannot fathom what is going on down in the the southern united states... my heart has been breaking all day for the people down there... even though it seems that people have been evacuated better and people are more prepared i cannot help but wonder what a lot of people are going to come back to, if anything at all...

now as i have been talking to timmy b. i have recently discovered that my youth ministry philosophy is sickeningly simple... in fact it is 2 words... here it is: "do something" that is it... just get your hands out of your pocket, your finger out of your nose and do something... love people, spend time with people, invest in people, serve people... for goodness sake, just do something!!!

incase it is unclear there seems to be a connection with the last 2 paragraphs... i am even quite nervous to mention this as i may be called on it... God let my yes be yes, but i cannot get the feelings out of my head that i have to do something for the people of the gulf coast... what that is, i have no sweet clue... send money, pray, i don't know... it seems bigger than that... obviously i need to give this to God but it is almost like He has been breaking my heart for the people there as if He wants me to be there and "do something"... please join with me in prayer regarding this as i try to determine what God is calling me to do here... obviously if He asked me to go i have to go, but there is things here that i have to take care of financially and other responsibilities, but i need to be faithful... this is scary, but it is about time i live this life that i want to live... is anyone else feeling this struggle of complacency? Army of the Lord, it is time to march...

why do i do???

2005-09-23T00:57:00.000-03:00

i am typing up this little ditty from the great state of Maine... well i am not sure about how great it is, but it seemed to flow right off of the tounge that way... i am spending the weekend at my mother's for a little bit of a break, to get my explorer fixed up a bit and as a new project i think i will do some dry wall mudding in my mom's bathroom tommorrow... so much for relaxing... actually i may do that too...
on the way down here from bangor there was an hour and a half stretch where i found a worship station on the radio and had a great time of praise to my creator... it was fun... but, as i type this i have a bit of a heavy heart... this is because i am a double minded man and Scripture says that kind of man will be like a ship tossed in the wind... (or something like that) God has increased my ministry territory on Grand Manan as of late, but i can't seem to focus just on Him... why the heck is this??? i have been asked to preach for some weeks to come (not sure how long), the boys and girls club's #'s have increased as have Central's youth group, working with Sidney has been great and supply teaching is starting to happen... one would think that with such a busy load of ministry and investing in people there would be no time to invest in self and selfish desires... i frustrate me...
i think i am at a point where what Paul said is really hitting me... why do i do what i do not want to do??? and why can't i focus "in Christ alone"... truly there are 2 things that i want in this world and they are time with my boys and to be right in God's eyes and that is not the order of priority just for the record... this whole double or triple or thousand mindedness is hard on the head and seems to pull in all directions... i hate it... Jesus, renew my mind... i am so much less than you want me to be and that drives me crazy...

i don't know what to say, but i gotta say something...

2005-09-15T20:09:00.000-03:00

i have to first off say that God is amazing and that is not just a cheezy awards show "God props" either... the TSA concert was amazing and then the sunday morning service was amazing... the concerts along with sickness caused me to lose my voice for 4 days... that made me realize that sometimes we treat God like we treat our voice... we don't realize how important it is to us until we are without it...

so here i am surrounded in teens at the boys and girls club trying to imagine what it is that God wants me to share as i was asked to preach at seal cove baptist church... it is funny because i have never considered being a senior pastor, but it has crossed my mind as i may have multiple chances to preach there... i don't think that is the direction God has for me but my mind has gone to what if... anywho i hope this post finds you all doing well and may the Lord's richest blessings be yours...
scottie

eviction, redemption and puddle hopping...

2005-08-31T19:13:00.000-03:00

so for all the non posting nazi's out there who are about to growl at me here is my update of the past few eventful days in the life of leighton...

last week i recieved a note on my door of my cottage and was informed that i had one month to find alternate arrangements of the living persuasion... i wasn't sure why at the time, but i found out today... apparently "we do not live this way" or at least that is what i was told by my rich land lady... i think my porch was a little untidy for her liking... boy, did i ever feel like a red neck, but then i thought about this pish posh comment and i laughed my head off... funny thing is that i am moving into a 3 bedroom house just down the street for roughly the same price... yay to say the least...

saturday i got to see my kids... nuff said... but i will say more... my baby is the fattest little sprinter out there... he has his daddies belly to say the least and he is walking big time... fun, fun, fun... oh yeah and my still married wife is with lee's biological daddy again (drama) and i met him on saturday... awkward, but this will be a later post...

and last but not least today kirk, tim, his sister heidi, and myself took some teens to go puddle hopping... we took pictures and it was amazing... one of the highlights was having 2 lines on either side of a puddle and one of the teens parents flying through the puddle with her van... great time had by all... so yeah, keep in touch and go to www.habhater.blogspot.com and buy one of kirk's DVD's...

and p.s. 7 Cent Tip aka the band i play in is opening for Three Season Ant on September the 10th @ GMCS... how exciting... i can't wait...

so that is all for now boys and girls... have a great week...

Off by 24 hours... shucks!!!

2005-08-15T14:15:00.000-03:00

so close, but not close enough is all i could say as i just missed a $400/ week job that would have allowed me to still do ministry in the evenings and keep my part time jobs...
my wonderful brother just got back from a week's vacation this sunday and he mentioned that he was speaking to a gentleman who needed another worker to help him make lobster traps for 40 hours a week at $10 an hour so i made the call since the guy was expecting me to and this seemed too good to be true... later on that evening the guy called me and told me that it was last week that he talked to my bro and since he did not hear from me he assumed i was not interested... so the long and short of it is that he hired a lady just the day before i called him... both he and i were kicking ourselves because he said he would have hired me in a second and since i just graduated from good ole BBC last year the government would have paid 70% of my salary... so hear i am with just my part timers again wondering if it is wrong for me to hope that things don't work out with this lady... so to quote an 80's band that i used to like and cannot remember the name of; "So close,yet so far away!"

Still waiting on Jehovah Jirah

Praise in the suckfullness...

2005-08-13T19:33:00.000-03:00

i have to admit that despite the stressful times when i have no sweet clue as to what is going to happen or how the heck i am going to get out of them it is good to know that God does not change and has a plan... i know that this sounds cliche, but let me explain... to be honest i am still quite anxious as to how things are going to pan out about things, but God reminds me constantly that He believes in me and the abilities that He has given me... this has been evident this summer as God has increased my ministries... Tim and Kirk have a lot of occasions when they have to be away during parts of the summer and on many of those occasions they have asked me to fill in... this includes preaching, leading youth and leading worship (youth and sunday morning)...

in my last church that i attended i was taken out of the ministries that i was involved with due to me being in the midst of a separation... that hurt, but i understood and truthfully did not want for my situation to be a distraction to peoples worship... but now that i am home and had some time to heal God has blessed me with opportunities and two Godly leaders for pastors and good friends... this just reminds me over and over that God's promises are just that; promises... the tough part that i tend to forget is that He will bring me through my other stuff as well... that for some reason i have a harder time remembering... but as i spoke with a lady today i was reminded again of the power that is in praise... how do you make the enemy flee??? one word... Jesus... praise that name and remember His promises, not my hopes or ambitions and we can make it... is it always easy??? heck no... God is faithful and that ain't no cliche...

Tough spot... need prayer...

2005-08-10T20:54:00.000-03:00

So here is my dilema and I may have mentioned this before... Ministry vs. Money... i am not even sure if it comes down to that, but things are tight and the thing that stresses me about no money is that it means no time with my boys... THAT SUCKS!!! if i were to pray specifically on this issue i would hope God provides a job for me during the day so i can continue to help with the local churches youth ministry as well as my ministry at the boys and girls club...

my latest hurdle is that i have been talking lately with legal representitive of a bank that covered part of my student loans... basically it come down to this... if they do not get their $26,000 by the end of the month they are taking me to court... now there is an alternative... this lawyer offered to cut my loan by about 12 or 13,000 dollars if i can get a co-signer and start making payments... (cheap ones too) but at this point there is no one who is able to helpe me in the matter... prayer is appreciated and advice is genuinely appreciated too... i would not even post this if i were not in such a pickle, but i need help... humbling spot to say the least...

~scottie~

Bad boys, bad boys, what ya gonna do?

2005-07-20T23:08:00.000-03:00

now this post may surprise some of you and some of you it may not... tonite i served my first game of a 2 game suspension from my local men's baseball league... personally i am not real sure how to feel... humbled? yeah, a bit... surprised? that too... i think i am mainly just laughing about it though because i have never been suspended from anything before... no technical fouls or ejections in any manner from any sport at all...(actually there was that time when i bit that guys ear off in the Bethany Boxing Federation, but i was hungry so can you blame me???) so this is a wierd place for me to be right now...

the long and short is this... playing second game of baseball on a long, hot saturday afternoon and the calls seem to be questionable and our bench became quite irritated... as did i... the difference being that i (in my opinion, politely) approached the umpire to get reasons for such travesties... others did not handle things quite so gentlemanly(is that a word???) ... i guess the ump was tired too after a long afternoon and did not appreciate our questioning and quit midstream of the game... on monday one of our team reps (we have 2) spoke with this ump and said that we had 2 options... either myself and 2 others were suspended for 2 games or he would never ump our teams games again... well if we had a surplus of umpires on Grand Manan this would be an easy choice for me because i thought the ruling was silly, but alas, we do not... in fact this umpire represents 50% of the umpires on Grand Manan so i am serving my 1st suspension from anything, ever this week...

do i feel that we were scapegoats and made an example of to show others in the league that this problem will not be tolerated... YOU BET I DO!!! if things were handled consistantly there would have been 10 different guys serving suspensions this week for "jawing" as they like to call it, but i guess that is not the point...

the point and humbling spiritual lesson is this... when i allow bad officiating or other people's actions (other teams that is) to control my attitude and take the fun out sports for me it is time to hang up the cleats... in fact i almost did saturday night as i tossed and turned til 1:00 in the morning hating what had happened, how i felt towards others, and who i became on that ballfield that day... does this apply to life??? i think so... you connect the dots...

but sunday night through numerous teens sharing with me their personal hurts and pains i realized that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ and he has awesome plans for me on this island with the young people so i best stop beating myself up, griping about "others", serve my time and move on... Satan has been attacking me big time as i realize this, but i will not be defeated so i guess all i really have to say is...

"Play ball!!!" (er, well not until next week that is....)

everything is the same...

2005-07-15T21:35:00.000-03:00

as i came up with the title of this post i realized that it is not a totally accurate title... as i saw my boys last friday i realized that they are not staying the same... they are getting BIG!!! although vaughn is not walking on his own yet, he walked around the mall with his mother as he held on to a lower makeshift handle on his stroller... i couldn't believe it... and lee, well lee is a monster... not a mean one, but a cuddly and friendly one... you know, like on sesame street... and not like elmo... he annoys me... i would say more like the cookie monster... friendly with an aggressive, hyper streak... anywho, that is what is no the same...

pertaining to my title it feels like things are moving slowing in the same direction that they have always been going... still missing the boys, still struggling with bills and being stressed and still with a car that is more content with not running rather than, well you know...

now don't get me wrong... i love my life here, but i guess i am just hoping that things could move more in the direction of closure in regards to my boys and "my time" with them... that is why i want a better car, that is why i wish there was more money to pay support to their mother... (is this complaining or just longing for more time with my boys, or both???)

i guess i would be okay with everything being the same if my boys were included in the routine... i feel selfish typing this, but it seems to me that a father, or a real father should long to be apart of his kids lives... there is too many deadbeats out there who don't give a damn (sorry) about their kids and yet they still get rights... where is mine? (for the record i am not challenging God here)

Perhaps this is the place where i need to be praying that God would teach me to be a better father for my boys so that when i get time with them i will know how to be a better dad... was that redundant or did i just repeat a thought in the same sentence??? ;7p

love yall, keep praying....

post creation report...

2005-07-05T15:55:00.000-03:00

all i can say is wow, what a week and man i need sleep... for those of you millions of readers who do not know, i was at Creation Music Festival in Pennsylvania last week... amazing... the concerts were great, worship was great, speaking was great, and God was totally there... amazing...

it is hard to say what my fave concert was, but if i had to choose, i would say Casting Crowns... does it make me old if i enjoy a band for the words and passion for the Lord above a kicking concert? if so i guess i am old... don't get me wrong, i enjoyed the kicking ones too and it was awesome that they were all about God too... great week...

two main highlights for me were this: 1) i was able to meet and chat with 2 guys from PA and they were really cool guys... one of them played in his churches worship band which gave an instant topic for conversation... as well he has gone through what i am going through in regards to marriage now... what are the odds??? well i was blessed as they prayed for me and we continued to chat and exchange emails...

2) God really challenged me to get alone this week... for those of you who do not know of creation, there are roughly 120,000 people there and 150,000 at night... unbelievable sceen during a worship time, but you would think that getting alone would be hard to do... especially since the people who i travelled with are some of my best friends... but i did and it was awesome... what a peace he gave me as i got lost in His presence amongst the other 149, 999 people... God's ways are not our ways eh?

please pray as i get to see the boys this weekend...

daddies day update...

2005-06-23T00:00:00.000-03:00

what can i say... holy cow... wow... praise the Lord... i don't know, but all i know is that my boys are the best... lee totally made me feel like a king with the gift and card he made me and my baby would not stop staring at and cuddling with me... king of the world baby, king of the world... now real life sets in again and i have to look at what i have to do to get more time with the boys... even better, time alone with them in my home... overnight, etc... you get the point... rubber meeting the road i guess... it has been long enough... yup...

oh and by the way... if you were getting excited to see pics of my boys here i apologize because that will not be happening... i told my ex that i would respect her wishes and not put thier (the boys) pictures online... she does not want any sick freaks that may be out there to see the kids and well... so if you want to see pictures of my kids pop you little email addy in my comments box and i will do my best to get ya some soon if i know you... and if you are a sick freak who is out there, shame on you, ruining all my fun...

another testimony...

2005-06-18T19:41:00.000-03:00

so here it is... another report to you all from the wonderful rock of Grand Manan... this time the report comes from another wonderful teen in my youth group... this girl makes me laugh a lot so i want you all to experience the joy that she brings me... she is now going to tell you about what God did in her life at May Rally 2005... it is so neat to see young people being obedient when God speaks... anywho, here she is...

Hey my name is Tatum and i had the most fun at may rally!!!! At all the rallys they had i learned something new.... the one I remember the most was when pastor Ken was talking about ..... ok just think about it this way ok you, God and Jesus were all on a rope and we'll hanging off a cliff and you were on the top god was in the middle and jesus was on the bottom and had to cut his own son off and when Ken was talking about it. it caught me and i told myself i have to follow him and not anyone else and thier is going to be good and bad times and it is hard to because i have been through it and it is very hard but all you can do to pray and God will do something about it!!!!!!
I learn't alot at may rally but it is to long so that is the one i liked the most
bye Tatum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tatum is one of the many grade sixers that have recently started coming to youth and have made an impact on my life... Sometimes it is easy to get frustrated with all their energy, but to be honest i would rather try to tame a wild grade sixer than to raise a dead one... (spiritually speaking that is) and to be honest why do we need to tame them anyway??? i think there are already enough boring Christians out there already... i don't know if i've mentioned it or not lately, but i really love being home and investing into the lives of these young people... PTL!!!

well tommorrow is daddies day and i cannot wait to see my little men... pics to come... i promise...

Baby b.day and Father's Day eve eve...

2005-06-17T21:37:00.000-03:00

today is the 17th and holy cow is it a busy day... actually all of mine have been that way lately... anywho my little baby boy turned 1 year old today... whoa... that freaks me out man... only 15 more of those and he will be asking me for the car keys... whoa, only 7 years and 2 months and lee will... (panic sets in) i need a new car for my boys to drive... although i had someone last week tell me that it was pretty... i think it was more mockery than sincerity...

yeah so on that note i am going to freddy on daddies day and i cannot wait... i bought a kite for lee and toys for the birthday boy... hooray, hooray... maybe we will hit golf balls (me and lee that is... may take vaugh a little bit) i give vaughn a year or less before he is better than his old man... lee is already there... pictures as soon as i figure out how to do it... anywho another testimony tommorrow...

I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!

2005-06-15T22:16:00.000-03:00

Now I realize that by the title alone this sounds like it will be a griping post, but it isn't totally... I am just exhausted and need closure...
on a positive note, I get to see my boys this Sunday which totally gets me fired up being that it has been another 2 months and Sunday is daddies day... woo fereaking hoo!!! Please pray... I really want a good time with my boys w/out conflict with my ex...
secondly, I am frustrated big time with something that I never thought I would have to face... I am interested in someone and the crappy part is that I cannot say a word to this person lest it be adultery... This is tough... Talk about feeling like I am gonna explode... heck yeah and it ain't the gas folks...
I am losing sleep and getting sick so if you are not already, please pray... And if you are... I need rest BIG TIME!!!!
now don't get me wrong, God is good and He is teaching me how to not live defeated for the most part (or when I listen... sheesh) but I am physically, emotionally, and mentally tired... I need closure and my life back... After a year and a half of chaos I am ready for a boring set scheduled kind of life again... BRING IT ON!!!

live report from the rock...

2005-06-10T21:44:00.000-03:00

Well it has been almost a week since my last post so I guess it is time for a new one, but since I cannot think of anything to write this second we will have this news update brought to you by Vanessa Corsini... I will be back after these messages...

Well I guess im bringing you an update of my spiritual life over the past 6 months.. Well Tim (my youth pastor) has helped me with my walk with Christ so much and also Scotty, If not for those to I would be down the wrong path. Last Saturday I was a Leader of Worship at the Contemporary service at Central Wesleyan. It was an amazing thing for me to see so many people of all ages worshiping the Lord.. Worship plays a huge role in my Walk with Christ. But another thing is Digging into the Word ... Its the most amazing thing to find out things you had never known before. Also on Sunday im getting baptized (YES)...Im so stinking excited. On June 22nd im headed to the Bahamas on a missions trip and im hoping I learn so much and also this summer im working as a Camp counselor..Well back to the Break News with Scotland Leighton.

well I think I have discovered a new theme that I am going to be doing for the next few posts... For all of my hundreds of readers (okay, who am I kidding... Just me) I think I will get testimonies of teens from our amazing youth group on Grand Manan... For real, these guys and gals are amazing and have been a huge part of the healing process for me during this rough stage in life... I love how God uses things and how He has a perfect plan... Sometimes ya just gotta trust I guess even when it doesn't make sense... leighton out....

Sevice # 7

2005-06-04T23:37:00.000-03:00

What a day!!! First I got to sleep in a bit which is always cool and then later in the day I got to play a game of baseball on my baby bro's team... So far we are 0-3, but when we figure out this whole pitching thing we'll win some... I think we are surprising people with our hitting... until then, Bad News Bears it is... or maybe I need to watch the Sandlot for inspiration... Has anyone seen The Sandlot 2??? Wow, that was random...

But the definately the highlight of my week was our contemporary service... So many things to make it awesome that I will put it in a list format...
1) God was there!!! (duh)
2) Dana Wells was there... (i love my little newfie maid)
3) Seal Cove Youth Band (led by Selinda Ingalls) opened up the service...
4) Our band opened Come and Fill Me Up with a U2 style... (i love my band)
5) Good size crowd of unashamed worshippers of all ages... (well, teen to middle agers)
6) I got to look down and see my brother (Christian of 8 mos) lift his hands and truly worship God... I could hardly play through that one... balled my eyes out!!! Praise the Lord!!!

It was a great night to say that least... Things got a little frustrating at the ball game so the service was a great followup and a definate highlight of the week...

Keep praying, still need work... Thanks all, love ya...

Scotland